What Max Got For Christmas by St. Fang of Boredom

Category:Maximum Ride
Genre:Humor, Parody
Language:English
Characters:Max
Status:Completed
Published:2010-01-09 21:11:17
Updated:2010-01-09 21:11:17
Packaged:2021-05-07 03:10:57
Rating:K+
Chapters:1
Words:615
Publisher:www.fanfiction.net
Summary:A parody of 'The 12 Days of Christmas' Maximum Ride style.

What Max Got For Christmas

Me: Well, this was one of the top 'Favorite Christmas Songs' on my old poll, so I figured I needed to Maximum Ride-ize it a bit.

Fang: You Maximum Ride-ize everything.

Me: :D It's a habit now.

Fang: Just remember the very important part that keeps us from having to get another lawyer...

Me: Oh, yeah!

On the First Day of Christmas, I Disclaim to Thee: That I do not own Maximum Ride. That'd be J.P. I don't own 'The 12 Days of Christmas' either. I don't know who does, actually. I just know I don't. If you know, feel free to tell me. :D

Fang: So, on with the song!

Me: -starts singing-

Fang: -facepalm- That's not what I meant...


On the first day of Christmas, Jeb gave to me:

A doomsday prophecy.

---

On the second day of Christmas, Gazzy gave to me:

Two gagging fits

And a doomsday prophecy.

---

On the third day of Christmas, Fang gave to me:

Three stolen kisses

Two gagging fits

And a doomsday prophecy

---

On the fourth day of Christmas, Iggy gave to me:

Four active bombs

Three stolen kisses

Two gagging fits

And a doomsday prophecy

---

On the fifth day of Christmas, J.P. gave to me:

Five Self-Titled Books

Four active bombs

Three stolen kisses

Two gagging fits

And a doomsday prophecy

---

On the sixth day of Christmas, Nudge gave to me:

Six throbbing headaches

Five Self-Titled Books

Four active bombs

Three stolen kisses

Two gagging fits

And a doomsday prophecy

---

On the seventh day of Christmas, Total gave to me:

Seven pieces of useless info

Six throbbing headaches

Five Self-Titled Books

Four active bombs

Three stolen kisses

Two gagging fits

And a doomsday prophecy

---

On the eighth day of Christmas, ter Borcht gave to me:

Eight reasons I fail

Seven pieces of useless info

Six throbbing headaches

Five Self-Titled Books

Four active bombs

Three stolen kisses

Two gagging fits

And a doomsday prophecy

---

On the ninth day of Christmas, Mr. Chu gave to me:

Nine dead fish

Eight reasons I fail

Seven pieces of useless info

Six throbbing headaches

Five Self-Titled Books

Four active bombs

Three stolen kisses

Two gagging fits

And a doomsday prophecy

---

On the tenth day of Christmas, Dr. M gave to me:

Ten Chocolate Chip cookies

Nine dead fish

Eight reasons I fail

Seven pieces of useless info

Six throbbing headaches

Five Self-Titled Books

Four active bombs

Three stolen kisses

Two gagging fits

And a doomsday prophecy

---

On the eleventh day of Christmas, Ella gave to me:

Eleven brand new outfits

Ten Chocolate Chip cookies

Nine dead fish

Eight reasons I fail

Seven pieces of useless info

Six throbbing headaches

Five Self-Titled Books

Four active bombs

Three stolen kisses

Two gagging fits

And a doomsday prophecy

---

On the twelth day of Christmas, Angel gave to me:

Twelve creepy new powers

Eleven brand new outfits

Nine dead fish

Eight reasons I fail

Seven pieces of useless info

Six throbbing headaches

Five Self-Titled Books

Four active bombs

Three stolen kisses

Two gagging fits

And a doomsday prophecy


Me: -wipes tear- That was so beautiful...

Fang: Uh...

Me: -whacks Fang- Oh, shut it.

Fang: Shall we post our post-Christmas Christmas fic now?

Me: Let's. Just some notes. Yeah, I know that there's going to be more than '5 Self-Titled Books', but it worked. I kinda meant that Angel gets 12 new powers, but it didn't sound right, so I wrote it the way it's written.

Fang: We done now?

Me: I believe so.

Fang: So...Post it?

Me: Si.

R&R?