Max Has a Boyfriend? And It's Not Fang by heaven-angel-15

Category:Maximum Ride
Genre:Humor, Romance
Characters:Fang, Max
Published:2006-11-29 17:23:46
Updated:2008-05-10 17:11:43
Packaged:2021-04-22 00:39:21
Summary:/ FAXNESS / Fang accidentally overhears Max confessing that she may have found a boyfriend. There's just one little's not him. Then, Max hears a message to Fang from 'his favourite girl'. There's just one problem ... it's not her.

Table of Contents

1. Max Has a Boyfriend ! ?
2. Fang Has a Girlfriend ? !

1. Max Has a Boyfriend ! ?

Hey y'all!


Here's a Maximum Ride one-shot that I wrote for a fanfic challenge a little while ago. I hope you like it, but i have to warn you that it contains a MR2 spolier.

And just to be clear...IT CONTAINS A MR2 SPOILER!!!!. If you don't want part of the MR2 book to be runied for you, you might wanna skip this fic.

Anyways, enjoy!

Love from, CK

Max Has A Boyfriend !?!? (And It's Not Fang!?)

It all started one unfortunate night.

It had rained (poured was more like it), Gazzy had let loose one too many gifts for the air to be considered sanitary, and Angel ands Nudge had pleaded to stay in a warm, fancy hotel, and Max's credit card (after paying for the stupid hotel) was deemed unusable after it emptied out her bank account.


And because they had no money, Angel had to use her mind-power-mumbo-jumbo to get them all food, and Fang was deemed her 'supervisor.'

That was why Fang was now wet, cold, grumpy, irritated, frustrated, tired, and carrying six hotdogs up to Nudge and Max in their room down the hall.

Fang muttered under his breath when he reached the door, now realising that he needed to knock on the door without dropping any of the girls' hot dogs or any of his own that he was eating.

Again, just perfect.

Fang rolled his eyes and sighed, but was distracted when he heard Max laugh girlishly through the door.

Fang froze in surprise.

Max hardly ever laughed like that. But the sound was beautiful…

The only times he'd ever heard her laugh like that was when they'd escaped from the School and spent the night staying up together, and that time she went on a date with that blonde-haired idiot…


Fang frowned and muttered under his breath, but was quickly brought back to reality by Nudge talking.

"…you really like it?" Nudge finished, a note of interest in her voice.

He could picture Max grinning as she spoke. "Let's just say, I think I've finally found a boyfriend that I could spend the rest of my life with" Max said, and Fang felt like time had stopped.

Max had found a boyfriend!?!? WHA-AT!?

He heard Max giggle again, but it sounded distant to his ears. He had to have misheard her. Max couldn't have a boyfriend. No way! Especially not without going through him first!

Fang quickly pushed the thoughts out of his head, trying to ignore the way his heart way clenching and the sudden urge to kick open the door, wrap his arms around Max and tell her that she was his.

His and his alone.

The door suddenly swung open and Fang turned in surprise to see Nudge and Max looking at him in surprise.

"Whoa, where'd you come from, Fang?" Nudge asked stepping back in surprise. Fang quickly put on an emotionless face and opened his mouth to speak, but was cut off.

"Wow, that is so weird" Nudge said. "I didn't even hear footsteps in the hallway or anything! It was like you just came out of nowhere and now 'poof!' you're in front of our door with these hot dogs. Wait! Oh my gosh! Are those hot dogs for dinner? Oh man, thank you so much Fang, I'm totally—"

"You're welcome, Nudge" Fang said, and Nudge stopped talking sheepishly.

Max grinned at Nudge's rambling, and Fang felt his heart jump a little.

Stupid feeling… Fang thought, trying to push it away.

"Here's your dinner guys" he said calmly, handing them each three hot dogs. Max smiled at him and took a bite immediately. "Mmm…phanks!" Max said, swallowing the first bite. "Can you ask everyone to come to this room though? I think we need to have a Flock meeting…"

Fang nearly groaned in irritation, but bit it back.

"Can't you do it?" he asked tiredly, and Max looked at him in surprise. He immediately regretted it and tried to stay casual but Max caught on.

"Fang…you look exhausted. Are you okay?' Max asked putting a hand on his forehead and leaning close.

Oh man…

"I'm fine" Fang said shrugging off her hand a little rudely. "I'll go---"

"Never mind" Max said quickly, a grin forming on her face. "I'll just send up the Max-signal to the Flock…"

Fang couldn't help but smirk. Nudge looked between the two in confusion, still chewing her hotdog.

"What's the Max-signal?" she asked through the last of her first hot dog. Fang and Max both grinned and Fang stuck his fingers loosely in his ears.

Max put two fingers in her mouth and whistled in a high-pitched note and loud as a siren, making Nudge moan and cover her ears while trying not to drop the hot dogs as the sounds of the Flock yelling and groaning were heard through the doors.

Unfortunately, dozens of other doors along the hall also started opening, and Max grabbed everyone and threw them into the room, closing the door guilty behind her with a sheepish look.

"Oops…" Max muttered.

Fang smirked and surveyed the room. It was identical to Angel and Gazzy's and his and Iggy's. Two beds were off to one side, there was a small bathroom, and a small wall that separated the beds from a tiny kitchen/sitting area.

Charming… Fang thought to himself sarcastically.

Dinner went by fast -- they all talked about what they were going to do now that Max's credit card was empty, What they could do to stop the Gasman from being…well…gassy, and when and where they were headed tomorrow.

Oddly enough, (in that creepy way that seems to come with being a human-mutant that was experimented on by crazy scientists) Max's Voice told her to look under the couch cushions, and she found another credit card.

Weird, huh?.

And they agreed to never let Gazzy have chilli again, and Max decided that they were going to head south tomorrow afternoon.

Problems solved. Woot, woot.

Later that night, Max sent the kids to bed (and Iggy went on his own), and reluctantly agreed that Nudge could tell Angel a story before she was to come back to the room and go to bed.

Which left Fang and Max alone together.

They talked and joked for a while, completely at ease and content. But the entire time, Fang's stomach kept knotting and tightening. Every second was killing him…did Max really gave a boyfriend? Who was he? How did she meet him? Better yet, how did he know her?!

Max stood up to grab sodas from the mini-fridge (one of the special luxuries for human-avian kids who stay in hotels) and Fang finally had to say it.

"Do you want Coke or Sprite?..." Max asked, her back to him.

"I heard you and Nudge this afternoon" Fang said quietly, almost unheard, but Max suddenly stiffened and he knew that he couldn't take it back now.

"Wh...What?" Max said, her voice shaking a little. Fang sighed to himself before he repeated it louder and with more surety.

"I heard you and Nudge talking about your boyfriend this afternoon" Fang said. He saw Max visibly wince and he knew that she was guilty. Max always winced when she'd been found out or felt guilty.

"I umm….Fang, I can explain..." Max said, and Fang felt the knot in his stomach tighten.

"Tell me when and how" Fang said coolly, leaving no room for Max to even try and argue. Max sighed reluctantly and closed the fridge empty-handed, walking back over to him timidly.

"Umm well I…I guess it was mostly because of Nudge" Max said guiltily, looking off to the side as she spoke and her gaze meeting Fang's only once or twice.

"A few nights ago, when we stopped outside that huge forest…remember? I was on watch and I caught Nudge sneaking behind some trees, and well, she had…" Max suddenly trailed off a curious look of recognition spreading over her face.

Suddenly, her head snapped up to stare at Fang, her eyes bright with anger.

"How did you know that Nudge and I were talking about boys this afternoon?" Max asked, and Fang winced as she saw him hesitate.

"You were eavesdropping on us, weren't you!?" Max said, her mouth forming a small, furious 'o' and her brown eyes bright with anger.

If only she knew how cute she looked like that...Fang thought, then quickly pushed the thought out of his mind as he remembered Max was waiting for an answer.

"I was not" Fang protested calmly. "I was just waiting to tell you both that I had your dinner and I—"
"So that's why you were outside our door!" Max said, pointing a finger at him and smirking triumphantly.

Fang frowned in defeat.

Dang it…

Max smirked up at him haughtily. "Well…explain yourself, Fang" Max challenged him. His frown deepened and his mind went blank of excuses. Seeing this, Max shrugged and grinned.

"If you really want to meet them—" Max began.

"Them!?" Fang echoed in disbelief, now really confused and worried at the same time. "There's more than one!?"

"Yes, there are two of them… oh-brilliant-one…" Max muttered to him, folding her arms over her chest defiantly and smirked. Fang's jaw nearly hit the floor as horrible images of Max with a guy on each arm, both flirting with her, floated into his head.

Okay, now he was ticked!

"Who?" Fang muttered through clenched teeth, trying to resist the urge to growl.

Max raised a careless eyebrow at him.

"Why do you care?" Max asked him coolly, looking calmly at him and waiting for a response.

Fang hesitated.

Max saw it and smirked.

"You are jealous, aren't you?" she said, and he knew that no matter what he said, she wasn't going to let me live this down. Fang couldn't help but roll his eyes in frustration.

"Yes, I'm jealous of your boyfriend….or boyfriends, whatever! And I can't help it! You deserve way better than whatever that idiot or those two idiots—whatever-- are giving you, Max! They don't know the real you! And I do! And like it or not Max, I care about you a lot!…so just…just..." Fang trailed off at a loss for words, mentally hitting himself over and over again as he finished.

Could he get any cheesier? And could he sound any more desperate?

Snap out of it, Fang! He told himself. Play it cool or else you're going to completely wreck the friendship that you and Max have!

His heart seemed to get heavier at this thought, and he forced himself to put on an emotionless expression. Max couldn't know how he really felt…she was better off that way…they both were…

"Fang…" Max said, a look of surprise and almost…happiness on her face. "Fang, look, I'm sorry. I pushed too far…I feel the same way about you—"

Fang's head snapped up and his heart seemed to skip a beat.

"--and the others too. I care for you all so much, Fang… I didn't mean to make you flip like that..." Max finished, and Fang could feel the air around him practically deflate with embarrassment t and disappointment.

Max was too naïve sometimes! Dang it! Didn't she understand!?

"Jeezums, Max! Don't you get it!? I LOVE YOU!!!" Fang shouted in desperation, turning to stare at her straight in the eyes with all the courage he had.

Max's pretty brown-eyes widened in shock and Fang immediately wished he could've taken back his words. They were true, and always had been, but seeing the stunned look on Max's face and hearing the deafening silence made his stomach twist uncomfortably.

She didn't feel the same…he knew it….

"Wow…Fang…" Max said, her brown eyes wide open and alight with an emotion that Fang couldn't place.

"Ummm….oh jeez…Fang..." Max said softly, and Fang could hardly believe his eyes when a huge smile spread over Max's face. She started to laugh, then put one hand over her mouth to respectfully stop, but only a few seconds later she burst out laughing and looked away, a huge smile on her face the entire time.

"Fang…my 'boyfriend' I told Nudge about isn't really my boyfriend!" she exclaimed, her smile widening when she caught the surprise and confusion in his expression. Fang just hoped she couldn't see the relief he was feeling too…

He sighed and shook his head, thankful that her 'boyfriend' wasn't really a boyfriend, but also realising that she hadn't said she loved him back.

This. Sucks. Fang thought miserably, trying to avoid Max's gaze. If there is a god, kill me now! Fang pleaded.

"Fang..." Max said, her voice ringing clearly through his thoughts.

He turned awkwardly, still avoiding her gaze, but was thrown off balance when he was pulled forward.

And Max kissed him.

His eyes shot wide in disbelief, meeting Max's bright brown ones before she closed her eyes and Fang suddenly found his own fluttering shut. He instinctively wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close.

She smelled so sweet, and she tasted in even sweeter. So much sweeter than he ever could've hoped, and he was addicted to it now.

I take back that death wish…Fang thought distantly, almost groaning in disappointment when Max slowly and regretfully pulled away.

Max's eyes met his when he opened them, and a dark but satisfied blush was spread across her cute, delicate cheeks. She just grinned and smiled at him, and Fang felt himself blush awkwardly too.

" Fang…" Max said gently, making his name sound so different coming from her mouth. "First of all, I…I love you too. A whole lot… and, I'm sorry it took so long for me to say it…and I'm sorry if that kiss was…uhh—"

"Amazing" Fang muttered, and then mentally hit himself when his cheeks grew hot and Max turned away, blushing furiously.

"Ummm…yeah." Max said. "Secondly, Fang, you shouldn't listen in on other people's conversations. They're private for a reason and you deserved this..." she said firmly yet kindly, just like the motherly-type-of-girl she was.

"Thirdly…I'm sorry…" Max said, making Fang's head snap up to meet her gaze, seeing her looking at him sheepishly. "The guys that you heard Nudge and I talking about aren't really guys, and I should've told you sooner—"

"Please tell me they're not girls" Fang muttered aloud and Max shot a horrified look up at him. She let out a small grin slip and she lightly smacked him over the head.

"No! They're not girls!" she said, sounding uncomfortable at just the thought.

"Ma-ax!…" Nudge whispered as the door creaked open, and Nudge's sing-song voice carried through to the two teenagers.

Nudge tiptoed around the corner a second later.

"I got Ben and Jerry from the fridge and I—oh…" Nudged suddenly trailed off and froze when she spotted Fang in the room. And he was shooting her a very understandable look.

"Out" Fang said coldly, and Nudge quickly turned and dashed out of the room, closing the door behind her again. Fang sighed to himself, playing back on Nudge's words.

"Ben and Jerry?" Fang repeated in confusion, then it was like someone threw a switch and everything cleared into focus for him. He almost scoffed at how ridiculous it was, turning to face Max slowly.

"Ben. And. in the ice cream!?!?" Fang said in disbelief, hardly believing how stupid he had been, and wondering how on earth Max and Nudge had gotten ice cream in the first place. Max grinned sheepishly up at him.

"What?" she said timidly, taking a step away from him. "They know how to make a girl happy" she said, a delighted, cheeky grin spreading over her face.

"Ben and Jerry are the two idiots that you've had me flipping over?! And they're not even real! And you're telling me that I told you that I loved you because I was jealous over two idiots whose names are on the side of an ice cream tub!?!?"

Max grinned like the Cheshire Cat.

"That's what you get for eavesdropping…." Max taunted.

But a second later Max caught the cold, furious, fierce glare that Fang was giving her, and her smile dropped.

"Uh-oh..." she muttered to herself, and Fang leapt at her, making her yell and run down the hall for dear life.

In the end, Max and Fang accidentally woke up the others (and half of the hotel) with their yelling and Max calmly ordered the Flock to go back to bed.

They reluctantly agreed after making sure that Max wasn't being attacked by Erasers, and Max spent a good two hours hearing Fang rant about how if he ever heard about Max and another guy, there would soon be a shortage of teenage boys left on the face of the earth by the time Fang was done with them.

And that eventually lead to Max shutting him up by kissing him, and a few more kisses before both went to bed grinning like idiots.

In the end, let's just say that Max only has one man in her life now --Fang-- and he's never let Max or Nudge buy ice cream since.


Did you like it???? PLEASE REVIEW!

Your comments/critism helps alot you know. LOL. I'll talk to y'all later!

-- CK

2. Fang Has a Girlfriend ? !

Hey guys! (:3)

I know I've been promising a second one-shot in this, err….series? (What do I call this? LOL.) This one-shot is a bit shorter than "Max Has A Boyfriend…" but I hope that it's still good. –crosses her fingers—

In any case, if you like it let me know! Plus, here's a big thanks to all of you for your reviews and comments and faves.

Heck, here's a thanks to you just for reading this! LOL.

Every time I open my (virtual) mailbox to see that someone's added my story to their alert list or has reviewed, it really makes my day. I'm so thankful to all of you! –hugs—

Plus, I know that I'm slow at posting and that I don't always credit you guys for all of the great PM's and reviews you give me, but I really appreciate this. So this is for all of you! THANK YOU!

--glomps her readers--

Secondly, I want to give a huge thank you to turquoise.seas for beta-ing this. Check out her Faxness stories -- they're incredible. She captures Max and Fang and the Flock perrfectly and her plotlines are always really unique.


-- Lots of Love from, CK (to you and your moms!)

--/-\-- Fang Has a Girlfriend !? (And It's Not Max !?) --/-\--

It was a bright, sunny day in the middle of June. The sun was shining, the trees had sprouted all of their leaves, and the sounds of car horns blaring filled the air, along with the cloying scent of sweat, hot dogs, and gasoline.

Max inhaled deeply, then shot a look over her shoulder at the Flock. "Don't you just love New York?" she asked teasingly. Nudge, Gazzy and Angel all laughed and nodded while Iggy and Fang remained silent but managed to spare a nod of approval.

"Max?" Nudge said suddenly, "I'm hungry. Can we stop for hot dogs?"

"Umm, I suppose so, just – " The young ones had already taken off towards a nearby hot dog stand before she'd finished. Sighing in submission, Max trailed after them, knowing that Fang and Iggy would be able to reach them in an instant if a problem arose.

"'Ey there, cutie, " the vendor said to Nudge. "What can I get for ya?"

"Umm…can I have 4 chili-cheese dogs and 2 dogs with ketchup and mustard?' Nudge asked politely. The guy did a double take and then burst out laughing as if he thought Nudge was joking.

"You suwre you fowr kids'll be able to eat all-a-'dis?" he asked. Nudge blinked in confusion, a small frown creasing her forehead.

"That was just my order," she said. The vendor did another double take.

After a few minutes of bargaining and Max planting her money on the stand where the vendor could se it, he was more than willing to give the Flock all the food they wanted.

After getting some grub, Max led the others to a few empty benches along the edge of a local public building. There was only enough room for two per bench, so Max opted to stand. Fang opted for the same, and soon the two found themselves standing side by side and smiling to each other for no reason other than that they enjoyed the close proximity.

Only a few weeks ago, there had been a "Ben and Jerry's" incident that had led Fang to confess that he was in love with Max, and she had done the same. Ever since then, not much had changed, but the newly-appointed couple had begun to boldly start flying closer, holding hands in public, and occasionally kissing when the Flock wasn't looking. It was almost like they were a normal couple.

However, Max and Fang's tender moment of closeness was soon broken. Fang was distracted by the idea of stealing the last hot dog with relish from Iggy, as the other dogs that had relish had been devoured on sight by Gazzy. Max sighed at the loss of her "boyfriend" and wisely chose to ignore the two boys bickering beside her as she turned on the Flock's cell phone.

The phone had been a "gift" –- for lack of a better word -- from Itex after the Flock had been there to explore the place. Iggy had been the one to find the box of high-tech new phones and had stolen as many as he could for making bombs.

Fang had saved one phone from becoming one of Iggy's creations, and the Flock had used it a few times to make anonymous calls to restaurants and to the labs (pay phones were beginning to cost too much). However, the phone had pretty much lost its use after Fang had liberated his laptop –- although it technically belonged to everyone in the Flock -- from Itex a few months later.

But now, Max needed the phone since Fang was getting too possessive of his laptop, and so she turned it on, saw the screen turn to its familiar pattern, and prepared to dial.

But something caught her eye – a blinking notice in the top right-hand corner.

"New message?..." Max read aloud to herself in confusion.

Who the heck would send them a message?! They'd passed through a lot of towns and cities, talked to few people – but never stayed or been friendly enough to actually make real 'friends' there.

She debated about just deleting it… but curiosity won over her instinct, so she moved over and clicked 'open' on the envelope icon on the phone.

"You have 1 new message" an automated voice informed her. "To hear your messages, please hit #1, to send a …"

Max hit the #1 button, listened as the automated voice thanked her for clicking #1, and then the message began.

She was stunned when an unrecognizable feminine voice was heard on the other end of the phone.

"Hey Nick, it's me…your favorite girl! I just wanted to call to say I had a great time yesterday. You were soooo sweet and you're soooo handsome…"

Max heard a high-pitched feminine giggle on the other end and felt her entire body stiffen in shock against her will.

"I just love spending time with you. I'm sooo head-over-heels for you, baby-cakes! Lots of love from your little you-know-who! Heehee! Call me sometime!"

The message ended.

The line went dead.

The automated voice informed Max that there were no other messages on their phone.

….There was a moment of silence.…

"WHAT THE HELL !?" Max exploded.

Everyone in the Flock (along with at least a few dozen other people) turned to face her, looking worried and confused.

Max felt her face heat up and shot a sheepish smile to the Flock, herding them away from the now-large group of staring people.

They all disappeared, heads down and shoulders slumped in the perfect "blend-with-the-crowd-so-as-to-not-raise-suspicion" way they had mastered, before Fang suddenly veered down a narrow side-street then stopped.

Since he was currently leading the Flock through the crowds, they followed him and all stopped too.

"Max, are you okay?" Nudge quickly asked once she had stopped turning to Max, her brown eyes wide. "You sounded like something really bad had just happened. Like…like…is Ari coming for us? Cause we can totally take him out, no problem! …Or is it that you –"

"It's nothing…just an…umm…." Max said quickly, wracking her brain for a reply. The entire Flock was focused on her now, hanging on her every word.

Max swore mentally before putting on a small smile.

"I'll explain later. It was just some …Voice stuff…"

"Are you sure?" Angel asked, looking worried. "I could almost hear your thoughts and it sounded like you –"

"Oh look! Ice cream!" Max shouted, quickly diverting the Flock's attention to the small ice cream stand a few feet away from them across the crowd. "Let's go get some! I've been craving mint-chocolate-chip all day…"

Max could see Iggy and Fang giving her 'what-are-you-crazy?' looks from the corner of her eyes, but she ignored them completely.

They obviously knew she was just trying to distract them.

Thankfully, the promise of ice cream was much more effective on the younger kids.

"Sweet!" Gazzy yelled, jumping around and pulling Angel with him as he headed for the ice cream stand. He spun on his heel before he hit the crowd, turning to Max and pulling Angel around with him.

"Can we get waffle cones?" he asked hopefully, bouncing happily.

"Sure, just this time though…and get a small!" Max warned as Gazzy jumped so high he practically hovered, only to be stopped by Angel who tugged him back to the ground. The siblings shared a glance before laughing quietly at the danger of almost being seen.

"Wait for me-e!" Nudge whined, quickly running to catch up to the two younger ones. "I want a scoop of triple-chocolate fudge! No, better…chocolate chip cookie dough! Actually, no…I think I'll get…"

The babbling faded away as Nudge, Angel and Gazzy disappeared to pick out their ice-cream flavor, and Max was left with an extremely curious Iggy and Fang.

"So, what's really going on?" Iggy asked.

"Nothing much…just Voice stuff, I told you that…" Max said, wondering why the lies she usually told so well sounded doubtful this time.

"Right," Fang muttered, rolling his eyes at her before piercing her with his dark gaze. "Just remember, Max, you will have to explain yourself later…"

"I'm not the only one who has some explaining to do…" Max said, feeling the angry words roll bitterly off her tongue before she could stop them.

Fang and Iggy both looked at her in surprise.

"What does that mean?" Fang asked lowly.

"You should know," Max replied, submitting to the fact that Fang was right – they were going to have to talk about this sooner or later. And because Max wasn't exactly what you would call a "patient person", she opted for sooner.

"Know about what?" Fang asked.

"Her," Max said venomously. "Your little 'you-know-wh-o-o" Max sing-songed, turning to pierce Fang accusingly with her eyes. Fang's gaze bored into hers in return as a frown overtook his features.

"What the hell are you talking about?!" he demanded, frustration creeping into his voice. "Stop fooling around and just tell me what happened. I know that this isn't really 'Voice stuff" so who are you talking about? What 'her'?"

"HER! How would I know who she is? You're the one she seems to want to talk to. After all, she is 'your girl'!" Max sing-songed again, her anger rising as the conversation continued.

"What girl, Max?!" Fang asked harshly, throwing his hands up above his head in frustration.

"Your 'favorite girl' , NICK!" she yelled back. Iggy looked between the fighting couple, watching both of their fists clench at their sides and their eyes darken dangerously. Wisely, Iggy took two steps backwards.

Ooh, if looks could kill...

"Umm, I'm gonna go got ice cream with the others," the blond pyromaniac said, backing away slowly.

"Fine." Max and Fang snapped in unison, never taking their angry gazes off of each other.

"Ok-ay," Iggy said, taking two more steps back. "GAZZY! Help, buddy!" he shouted, relief flooding into him when Gazzy's familiar palm tugged him out of the soon-to-be war zone. Fang watched his friend leave from the corner of his eye before turning back to the now furious looking brunette.

"Look, Max, what the heck are you talking about?" Fang demanded, trying to sound calm.

"I'm talking about the fact that you're supposed to be my boyfriend, and we've barely been dating for a month, and you have girls leaving creepy messages for you on the phone," Max told him, shoving him roughly in the chest. Fang, being Fang –who didn't take abuse from anyone—did the macho thing and shoved Max in return.

"What message?" he mocked, feeling his temper rise and his composure begin to break.

'The message from your girl –"

"What girl!?'

"—who wanted to tell you about how you're 'sooo handsome and sooo cool and sooo totally awesome, Nick!'" Max spat out, raising an eyebrow at him. "And she wanted to tell how much fun she had last night."

Fang did a double take as Max spat out the last two words venomously, her eyes vicious. Then, his eyes narrowed in return as he fixed her with an icy look.

"Don't tell me that you think I went on a date with some girl, I barely know, and you never found out about it. Are you really that dense?" Fang groaned.

"I know I'm smarter than the girl in your message," Max retorted. "At least when I speak I can pronounce words – like 'so.' It only has one 'o'. Congratulations, you've now reached a second-grade level of spelling." Fang rolled his eyes, but mentally tucked the insult away for later. He may have been mad at Max, but that insult had been pretty good.

"Max," he said, fixing her with a hard look, trying to convey the truth in his words, "there is no girl."

"Tell that to her, because apparently she thinks there is!" Fang groaned in frustration, glaring at Max and cursing her stubbornness with every colorful word he knew. She was still looking at him accusingly, her hands on her hips – as if he'd actually done something wrong! Argh!

"Okay, you know what – give me the phone" Fang said after a moment of tense silence. Max eyed him warily, noticing the set line of Fang's mouth and the way his eyes had darkened in determination. He would have looked and attractive…if he wasn't such a lying, cheating jerk, Max reminded herself.

"Why do you want it?" Max asked suspiciously, holding the phone out of his grasp. Fang rolled his eyes at her immaturity.

"Did you delete this 'so called' message?" Fang asked, as though he were speaking to a child. Max frowned at his tone but answered the question without hesitation.


"Good, then give me the phone. I'm going to prove to you that you're crazy," Fang told her. Max gaped like a fish for a moment before she bristled angrily at the insult.

"Fine! Here!" she said, shoving the phone into his hand. How dare he call her crazy. She was not crazy! (Ignoring the fact that she had a voice in her head and wolf-men that stalked her everyday…but that's beside the point...)

Fang took the phone and skillfully accessed the messages, pulling the phone to his ear while shooting Max a look. She shot him one right back and watched his face for any sign of recognition.

There was a moment of nothingness on Fang's face, before he gave a small frown, obviously listening to the message. Max grinned smugly, waiting for Fang's reaction and waiting for him to stutter in embarrassment at being caught cheating on her.

To her surprise, though, Fang's frown only deepened. There was no hint of recognition or guilt. Fang just looked…confused.

He honestly had no idea who the girl was.

Max suddenly clued in that Fang had been telling the truth, and felt a wave of embarrassment and guilt wash over her. Some loyal and faithful girlfriend she was… she should have had more trust in him.

However, just as Max was about to open her mouth and apologize, Fang's eyes went wide and she saw a light of recognition flash quickly into them. Needless to say, all of Max's thoughts of apologizing went straight to the gutter.

"Aha! I knew it! So you do know her!" Max shouted in triumph. Fang sighed, rolled his eyes and then ran a hand through his overly-long black hair.

"No, I don't! Look, Max, you made a mistake –!" Fang began irritably.

"Hey guys," Iggy interrupted, walking over with his ice cream in hand. "What's going on?"

"Stay out of this Ig! I'm proving that Fang is a lying cheating --" Max snapped.

"Wait, what?"

"Iggy," Fang barked, seeing the blond. "Explain this message to Max before she—"

"What message?" Iggy asked. Fang glared at him.

"The one you sent to my phone that's currently getting me in a load of sh –"

Gazzy trotted over to Iggy's side. "What are you guys talking about?" he asked.

"—Sh-sugar," Fang covered quickly.

"No, I'm serious, Fang - what message are you talking about?" Iggy asked.

Even though Iggy was blind, Fang glared at him again. This time, the glare was so fierce that the feeling of Fang's eyes on him was enough to make Iggy squirm. Fang roughly walked over to Iggy and shoved the phone into his hand.

"Listen," Fang ordered coolly. Iggy put the phone to his ear and obeyed without question. Then, a few long moments later, Iggy's face broke into a delighted grin.

"Oh man! I remember this!" the blond whooped. "This message is ancient though… you got this a long time ago – like, months before the laptop," Iggy said. Fang growled something unintelligible before he stepped forwards until he and Iggy were face to face.

"Not helping," Fang warned. "Now, explain this to Max before she gets all freaky, or throws a hissy fit –"

"Hissy fit?!"

" – or does something stupid," Fang continued, ignoring Max's outburst completely. Iggy audibly swallowed at Fang's dangerous tone and chuckled nervously.

"Okay, okay…" Iggy muttered. "I didn't even know that this message was still on the phone, so just chill. I mean, I thought you would've found it ages ago. After the first four messages – "

"Four!?" Max yelled, turning her gaze back to Fang. "So this 'favorite girl' of yours wasn't the only one calling you!?"

"NO!" all three of boys of the Flock shouted. Max planted her hands on her hips and all three boys suddenly seemed to realize what they had said.

"I mean, YES!" Iggy and Gazzy shouted, waving their arms at Max in defense. Fang just sighed, rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment.

"Max," he began, "what I meant to say is that yes, there were other messages, but you—"

"I wasn't your girlfriend at the time," Max concluded. "So you thought it was okay to have these girls all over you?"

"Don't you ever make that assumption!" Fang growled out. Max growled back and put on her 'don't-mess-with-me-because-I'm-the-leader-here' face.

"Max, would you just shut up and listen!?" Fang said, at his wits end.


"Just quit being so stubborn!"


"You're acting like a kid, Max! Grow up and be mature about this!" Fang barked, his body visibly tensing as he tried to contain his frustration.

"Oh, bite me!" she retorted, then began fluently cursing the dark-haired teen under her breath. "Ugh. Fang, you are such a stupid, redhead-attracting, look at me-I'm-tall-dark-and-handsome', bird-brained –!"

"Iggy!" Gazzy pleaded. "Quick! Tell Max about what happened before she kills Fang!"

"Tell me what?" Max said irritably, turning to Gazzy.

"Umm, that none of this is Fang's fault?" Iggy offered timidly, fearing Max's wrath. "It's mine? Hehehe."

At this, Max froze in place and turned to face Iggy slowly. Iggy seemed to sense that she was glaring daggers at him as he quickly pointed at the eight-year old.

"It's also Gazzy's fault" Iggy tattled.

"Hey! Don't pull me into this!"

"Explain yourselves," Max ordered. Both blond boys immediately went quiet and began fidgeting nervously with their fingers. Max would have known that look anywhere – they pulled it every time she asked them if they had been making bombs out of household items again.

"Well," Iggy began licking his lips, "The thing is, Max …umm –" Iggy chuckled sheepishly and then turned away from her, muttering something unintelligible to his shoes.

"Repeat that," Max said.

"I said that … GazzyandIthoughtitwouldbefunnytoplayaprankonFangsowehadGazzy pretendtobeagirlandleaveflirtymessagesonhisphone," Iggy mumbled in a slightly louder voice.

"Repeat it again, but slower this time, Ig."

"Umm, I said that … Gazzy and I thought it would be funny to play a prank on Fang so we had Gazzy pretend to be a girl and leave flirty messages on his phone?" Iggy offered with a sheepish grin. Gazzy, being the brilliant kid that he was, took off running when he saw Max's expression at these words.

"And once he heard the message," Iggy continued on, oblivious, "Fang's face was so funny, that Gazzy and I decided to leave three more. Gazzy would use his voice manipulation to make it sound like he was a teenage girl, and then we'd leave the message for Fang to find later. Fang figured out it was us after the second call, but it was still really funny to see his face when he heard them. So, a few weeks after our last message, we left Fang this one…which he obviously didn't pick up. Isn't that funny? Hehe...he…heh.."

There was a moment of silence among all three of the older Flock members.

"Fang?" Max said suddenly, not taking her eyes off of Iggy.

"Yeah?" he replied.

"I uhh -- I guess I shouldn't have freaked out like that" she said reluctantly. "I just thought, I mean -- ugh! Fang, I'm… I'm sorry…. really, I am —"

"It's fine," Fang said quickly, relaxing at the sound of Max's normal voice. "I would've been suspicious too – especially if I heard some guy leaving a message on the phone for you."

Max caught his eye, and he rolled his eyes before nodding at her gently. It was their silent communication – all was forgiven between them. Iggy sensed that things between the couple had eased out and he let out a breath of relief, thinking he would be able to escape.

Boy, was he ever wrong.

"Max?" Fang began.


"Since you accused me of a being a redhead-attracting, lying, cheating jerk, will you do one thing for me?'

"I guess. What is it?' Fang turned his gaze to Iggy, a malicious smirk on his face.

"Help me kill the pyro and I promise to forgive you."

"Deal," Max said with an evil grin, watching Iggy back away slowly at the tone of their voices.

"Actually, I have a better idea," Max said, stopping Fang before he could move towards Iggy. "Fang, let me do the honors of killing him."

"What!?" Iggy yelped.

"After all," Max continued, "Iggy is my Flock member, you're my boyfriend, so he should feel my wrath…plus, I wouldn't want you to get your hands dirty." She caught Fang's eye, watching him grin devilishly.

"You know, you're really cute when you get possessive," Fang said, the corner of his mouth twitching upward in amusement.

"Likewise," she muttered sarcastically, giving him a grin in response.

"Whoa, whoa!" Iggy pleaded, still backing away from the two teens. "Kill me!? Hehe… heh... heh… I mean, come on, guys, it was a joke! You weren't actually dumb enough to fall for Gazzy's voice trick, were you Max?"

Max let her silence speak for her. To her pleasure, Iggy's eyes widened in horror and his smile dropped instantly.

"You did fall for it didn't you?" Iggy realized.



"Oh yeah, 'uh-oh' is definitely right…" Max said, stalking towards Iggy with a creepy smile that Angel would've been proud of.

Then, Max proceeded to show Iggy just who the "dumb" one really was.

By the time Max was done, she and Fang were contentedly strolling hand in hand, Fang was eating Iggy's ice cream cone, and Iggy and Gazzy had all of their bombs "confiscated" for the following two weeks

Max had to admit that life was good when you were the Flock leader. Plus, having a boyfriend who looked like the Angel of Death (and sounded even scarier when whispering threats to a blind guy while having him captured in an iron-grip-headlock) only made life all the better.

/-\ THE END. /-\

Poor Iggy. LOL. Ouch…


--shifty eyes—

Okay, that's all I've got. And I just realized that --without even trying-- both of these MR one-shots involve ice cream. (XD) HA! Isn't that crazy!?

So, tell me, how was this fic? Good? Bad? Funny? Horribly Cheesy? Cheesy enough to be really good? Tell me your thoughts, oh brilliant ones!