The Prank Wars by EdwardAddict

A/N: Ok. This is my first Max Ride fic thingy, so don't be too harsh. I tried my best. I really hope you like it. Slight Faxness. But not too much. Oh yeah. The voice is in italics and underlined. Max's thoughts are italicized.

A/N 2: I'm rewriting a lot of this to make it a better read. And while I'm thinking about it, there's a lot more Fax than I let on earlier. xD

Warning: Most likely OOC. It's a humor fanfic, people. This isn't going to happen in the books, so it's going to be OOC. Deal with it. And really, after 30 plus chapters of this, it's become more of a crackfic anyway.

Disclaimer: I don't own Maximum Ride or anything else you may recognize.

Chapter 1-Truth or Dare

Max's POV

Great, just great. A storm. We're stuck huddling together in the world's smallest cave because it's too wet to fly.

We have about ten feet to move around, so tt's more than a little uncomfortable. Nudge, Gazzy, Angel, and Total are all in a tight circle. Lucky me, I'm sandwiched between Fang and Iggy.

You know you like being this close to Fang.

I do not! He's like my brother; I don't like him like that.

Sure, sure.

If you say one more thing about me liking Fang, I will punch you so hard-

I am in your head. You'd be hitting yourself.

Oh shut up. For once, it listened to me. What a nice surprise.

"Hey Max, I was wondering since we're stuck here till the storm ends and all if we could play Truth or Dare. I heard about it when I was at school. I mean it sounds really fun and it could help pass the time and-,"

"Sure Nudge. We'll all play."

Fang gave me a glare that clearly said, 'Thanks a lot.'

"You're welcome," I said with false cheer. It's not like I wanted to do this either. But at least it got Nudge to shut up.

"Max, since it was my idea, can I go first?"

"Sure thing."

"Okay. Max. Truth or dare?"

Oh crap. Despite my lack of a social life, I learned enough to know which to pick. "Truth."

"When you went on that date with that guy Sam, did you guys kiss?"

I blushed. I didn't want anyone else to know about that. In my quietest voice, I answered a small 'Yes'.

"I knew it! I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!" Nudge shouted.

"Ok, moving on. Um, Iggy. Truth or dare?" This is to back at him for always playing tricks on me.

"Truth." Well. I hadn't planned on that. What to ask, what to ask. I could--no. Not that. Umm... Got it!

"Where do you hide all of your explosives?"

"Not that Max. Please? Anything else but that!"

"Nope. Where do you keep 'em?"

Iggy let out a dramatic sigh. "My backpack."

"Is that the only place?"

Again, he sighed. "No. My, er, my boxers...," he admitted.

I burst out laughing. No wonder I'd never found them before! Well, I know now, but I wish I didn't ask. Bad mental image.

"Ok, Iggy it's your turn now," Angel reminded him.

"Gazzy. Truth or dare?"

Of course, my little trooper picked dare. Poor thing. He's a little too brave for his own good. Iggy dared him to sing "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" while dancing with Total. So funny!

I wish Iggy could see it. That boy has a knack for thinking up dares.

Next, Gazzy decided to torture Fang.

"Fang, truth or dare?"

Fang caught my eye, giving me a look that said, 'Do I really have to do this?' I nodded. With a disapproving grunt, he said, "Dare."

Gazzy grinned like a madman and rubbed his hands together just like the bad guys in cartoons do. "I dare you to wear Max's bra."

Fang's eyes widened considerably, breaking his "show no emotion" rule. My face had to have shown a similar look.

"No backing out, Fang. You have to; you picked dare. It's the rule," Gazzy said.

Seeing how the mutant kids on the run don't have the time or money to get more than one set of clothes, I would have to take off the bra I was wearing. I groaned internally.

Cursing my inability to resist the Bambi eyes, I piled all of our belongings into a wall in front of me. I quickly took off my bra and went back to the others. Tossing Fang my bra, we shared a look of impending doom.

Fang's POV

This could not be happening. This cannot be happening!

Max walked out from behind the wall of our stuff and handed me her bra. It looked extremely uncomfortable. Underwire and lacy. This just keeps getting better and better, doesn't it?

I pulled my shirt off and attempted to put the thing on. Why did Max make me so this? I wanted to scream, but that would be breaking an unspoken Fang rule.

Of course, me being male and not having to wear bras every day left me clueless as how to get it on.

"Max, he's having trouble. You should help him," Angel said. Great, just great. Blushing, Max scooted over and got it on me. I caught her ogling my chest. That's one upside to this whole ordeal.

Damn my teenage hormones.

Gazzy started laughing uncontrollably.

"There. Happy? Can I take this off now?"

"Nope. That was only part one of my dare." When this is over, Max is so dead.

"You can't do that!" I protested.

"We never said we couldn't when we started."

I huffed. "Fine. What's the second part?"

"You have to kiss Max." Oh. My. God. Sure, there might be something there between us, but I don't want to find out in front of the whole flock! This can't possibly get any worse.

Max's POV

"You have to kiss Max." Oh. My. Gods. Do they want me to keel over from embarrassment?!

"You have to," Gazzy so kindly reminded us.

Fang scooted closer and hesitantly brushed his lips across mine. He tastes so good, I found myself thinking.

So Fang wearing my bra and kissing me in a cramped cave in front of the others wasn't exactly my idea of romantic, but that's what I got.

We pulled away, each of us sporting a shade of red.

"There's not a third part of the dare is there?" Fang questioned, half joking, half serious.

"Of course. You have to dance for us, too." Gazzy is truly a mastermind. A cruel, demonic mastermind. But I love him anyway.

Groaning, Fang got up and showed us his moves. Which, in my opinion, weren't so good.

But man, you have not lived until you see a hot--, I mean a guy, normal, regular guy in a lacy bra, dancing badly in a cramped cave. Oh, god, it's hilarious.

Fang's face got redder by the second. Boy, he sure is breaking a lot of "Fang rules" tonight. He finished up and sat down quickly, covering his face with his hands. It was Fang's turn next, and he was out for revenge.

He looked up and stared at me, an evil flicker in his eye. Oh crap. That's not good.

I looked for something, anything that could get me out of this. I glanced at the mouth of the small cave. At least it stopped raining. That's it! It's not raining anymore! Yes!

"Hey look, guys! It stopped raining! We can leave now!" I shouted.

I gathered everything up, and Fang put his shirt back on, apparently forgetting he was still wearing my bra.

I'll get it back later. If we don't leave now, I'll have to face the wrath of a Fang with an injured pride. Not good.

"Let's move!" I called, leaping out of the cave and into the afternoon sky.

Fang flew up next to me. "This isn't over, Max. You'll pay. Not today, maybe not tomorrow, but you will eventually."

Knowing Fang, he'll never forget about this, not in a million years. But it's not even my fault! I felt like shouting.

But it is your fault, Maximum. You made him participate.

So you're against me too? Great.

It was silent, of course.

We flew for another three hours, finally finding an abandoned warehouse to crash in. Thank god this is over, I thought to myself before falling asleep for the night.

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Chapter 2 - Sweet Revenge

Fang's POV

Max is dead. Beyond dead. I'm gonna kill her, then bring her back to life, and kill her again. She just had to make me play that stupid game, didn't she?

I will get revenge. But what should I do? May I could--Nah. Not good enough. No, wait! I got it! Yes! Maximum Ride is going down. Thank god this building still has running water.

I stiffened as I heard shuffling feet coming towards me--reflex. I relaxed again seeing it was only Max.

Gradually, the rest of the Flock woke up. For our delicious and nutritious breakfast we downed some granola bars and warm Cokes.

"Okay, guys. Let's get cleaned up. There's running water, so we'll be able to have some kind of shower. Hop to it," Max said.

Angel, then Gazzy, Nudge, Iggy, and I had our showers. I got dressed again quickly, and rushed into the place Max was bathing.

I walked as quietly as I could, which is pretty quiet. Grabbing her clothes quickly, I made my way out of there. I stuffed her only outfit into my backpack, underneath my things.

After four minutes had passed, I heard Max's very loud screech. "WHO TOOK MY CLOTHES?" I muffled my laughter.

Max's POV

I got out of the shower, reaching for my clothes. My hands only grabbed air. I looked all around for them. Not finding them, I let out a shriek. "WHO TOOK MY CLOTHES?"

Oh my god. This has to be Fang's revenge. Perfect. I didn't even do anything to him!

I wrapped the sheet we were using as a shower curtain around my body, making sure everything was covered. I stepped out, and started looking for Fang. He's dead meat.

I found demon child (Fang) in a room by himself. "Where the hell did you put my clothes?"

"What are you talking about?" he replied in his normal 'I-don't-care' tone.

"You took my clothes as revenge. I want them back. Wait, you're still wearing my bra. I need that back too."

"Yeah, can't figure out how to get it off." I rolled my eyes and instructed him to take off his shirt. At least I could get that part of my outfit back.

"So where are the rest of my clothes? I know you took them."

"Sure I did. And hell froze over last week."

He's so frustrating! I walked out in search of Nudge. After five minutes, I found her playing some weird hand game with Angel. "Nudge, I need your help."

"What do you need?"

"I need you to use you touch power thing so you can find where Fang put my clothes."

"He took your clothes? That's terrible! You should get back at him! You could dye his clothes or steal his stuff or something." We ended up where I had started, in the room Fang occupied earlier. Nudge got his backpack and dug my crumpled clothes out of the bottom. "Here you go, Max. Think about what I said before."

"Thanks, Nudge."

We left for a new place soon enough. I flew up to Fang and pushed him.

"What was that for?" he asked innocently.

"For stealing my clothes. You've just messed with the wrong bird girl. This. Means. War," I said coldly.

He is so dead.

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Chapter 3- Let the Games Begin

Now, to plan my retaliation. Hmm... What would really get on Fang's nerves? I drew a big blank. Oh my gosh! I'm a genius! All I have to do is to get the supplies at the store today, wait till he's sleeping, then Bada Bing, Bada Boom--my revenge! This will be good.

I decided it was about time we gave into temptation and pampered ourselves. When we reached a town, I signaled to land in an alley behind some stores. We walked to the nearest hotel and got three rooms. Angel and Nudge grabbed the first key and Iggy and Gazzy took the second.

Looks like I'm rooming with Fang. That'll make my plan easier.

Fang and I set our stuff down on the beds and he headed for the bathroom. Do I want to know what he's going to do? No. Am I sticking around to find out? Also no.

"I'm going to the store!" I called to Fang. Not waiting for a reply, I walked out of the hotel and down to the stores we landed by.

Trying to act casual, I strolled (yes, strolled) over to the dyes. Grabbing some bright pink, I headed to the register to pay.

Now all that's left is to wait till Fang goes to sleep.

We all gathered in my room and ate dinner; pizza, rolls, and salad.

An hour later, we stacked and tapped and the others went to their own rooms. I watched Fang as he got into his bed. Eventually, his breathing slowed and I knew he was asleep.

I walked over to my bag and got the pink dye out. As quietly as I could, I headed toward Fang's bed. He had neglected the blankets, instead lying on top of them. Could this be an easier? I thought to myself.

I opened the container of dye and went to work. After ten minutes, I stepped back to admire my work. Absolutely brilliant! Fang's normally black wings were dyed bright pink (his most loathed color). The bottle said it would stay in for at least six months. This has to be my best idea yet.

I climbed into my bed and drifted into a slumber full of good dreams.

I was awoken by Fang's angered yell. "MAX! WHAT DID YOU DO TO ME?" I guess he saw his wings.

"What ever do you mean, Fang dear?"

"You know damn well what I mean!" His voice—you have to love puberty—squeaked on the last word and I struggled to keep a straight face.

"Payback. Don't mess with me. You just started a war and I'm going to finish it." Yeah, a little cheesy, but it got the message across.

"But PINK?!"

"Yes, very good Fang. That is the color pink." I guess he didn't appreciate my sarcasm--he shot daggers at me. I'm in big trouble now.

"We should get moving. I'll go round up the others."

We all met back in my room, the smaller kids bursting with laughter when they saw what I did to Fang. Gazzy described it to Iggy between laughs.

Fang, with a mix of embarrassment and anger on his face, ushered us out the hotel and into the sky.

"How long does this dye last?" he asked me.

"The bottle said six months. Hey, don't you dare glare at me. You deserved it."

I am in trouble now. But I'll just have to deal. This is too much fun to back out now. Watch out, Fang, I have tons of ideas. You'll be sorry you ever stole my clothes.

A/N: Done. Sorry it's short, but get use to it. This story will probably have chapters about this size every day. Thanks for reading!

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Again, if you have suggestions, I'll use them all. Eventually. Just PM me.

Chapter 4 - Recruiting Help

Fang's POV

This means war! I could stand nearly anything but dying my wings PINK? How did she think of that? Is there a book or something called "Pranks for Winged Kids?"

Okay. I have to think of something really good. I might need some help though... GAZZY! He's great at this stuff.

When we landed, I found Gazzy and pulled him aside. "Hey, Gazzy? Could you help me with something?"

"Yeah, what is it?"

"I need you to help me get back at Max for dying my wings pink."

"Awesome! Now I have an excuse to put my plans into action! YES!" He punched the air with his fist.

We spent the next hour going over different ideas, finally deciding on one after a huge debate. I went into town for the supplies—supplies meaning high heels.

While Max was telling Angel a story, I snuck over to her bag and switched her beloved combat boots with the new high heels. I ran off into the forest, stashing the boots in a tree. If I threw them away, I'd really be dead. This is more of a warm-up prank though, I still need time for the big one.

- - - -

We were about to leave our little cave and Max was searching frantically for her boots. "Fang, have you seen my boots?"

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. Maybe you should go look near your bag. You probably overlooked them."

She quickly walked to her stuff and dug everything out of her bag, finally finding the heels. "What the heck am I suppose to do with these? WHERE ARE MY BOOTS?"

"No clue. But we have to go now. Can't stay too long in the same place." Funny, she's usually the one saying that. "Just wear those."

She sighed heavily. "Fine, but I'm not happy."

"Wow, Max. You look so girly," Nudge said. "If you had those, how come you didn't wear them on your date with Sam? Or when you're trying to make F-," Max slapped a hand over her mouth. What was she going to say?

Max's POV

I can't stand Fang sometimes. Forcing me to wear heels! Humph. So dead.

That's when it happened. I saw a hot guy and turned around to get a better look, proceeding to trip over my shoes. I did a face plant on the side walk. I know, how smooth of me.

Dang, Fang's getting better at this. I'm going to have to up my pranks.

I. Will. Win. This.

Beware Fang. Mwahaha!

A/N: Good? Bad? Feedback people.

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A/N: Mmkay guys. I finally got someone to ask me what Nudge was going to say before Max slapped her hand over her mouth. So here's Nudge's uninterrupted speech.

"Wow, Max. You look so girly," Nudge said. "If you had those, how come you didn't wear them on your date with Sam? Or when you're trying to make Fang jealous, or like you, or think you're hot or something like that? I mean, not that he doesn't already. You guys should really talk things out. You know what that reminds me of? Gilmore Girls. I love that show. I watched it when we were at Anne's house. Maybe I could watch it again sometime."

Lol. But I knew Max wouldn't let her get that far into the speech with Fang standing right there. :D Enough stalling, here's the new chapter.

Wait, warning first. THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS UNDERAGE DRINKING AND HILARIOUSITY. You may resume reading now. :)

Chapter 5- Walking, Talking, Flying Rainbow

Max's POV

Day two without my boots. Lovely. It seems like every ten minutes I find myself making out with the floor, thanks to these shoes. Fang will pay. Those stupid shoes he's making me wear give me more bruises than 10 Erasers ever could.

We took off, heading for Canada. It was more of a spur-of-the-moment idea rather than a plan. Maybe the whitecoats won't find us if we're in another country, I thought wistfully.

After four consecutive hours of flight, Nudge said that she was hungry. We found a McDonald's and landed put back. While searching in the dumpster for "gourmet food", I found an unopened bottle that smelled a lot like rum. I grinned evilly. A perfect prank.

First, I'll spike his coke and claim it was an accident. This is perfect.

Max, you shouldn't do this. A drunk is never a good thing.

Since when do you care? I snapped at it. Besides, he deserves it.

The voice shut up. Good.

We found a park nearby and nestled under a tree to eat. Before Fang could grab anything, I poured a large amount of liquor into his bottle.

He downed it in less than three minutes, not noticing the extra ingredient. Or maybe he did, but wanted to drink it anyway...

Fifteen minutes later, Fang was as loopy as a dodo bird. He walked up to me and took my hand.

"Max, there's something I've wanted to tell you," he said, his words slurred.

"What is it?"

"I love you. Always have, always will." Did I hear him correctly? Un-emotional Fang just said he loved me! The rum must have made him crazy. Despite my nagging doubts, I believed what he said, if only a tiny bit. I love him, he loves me. This is just so perfect. Now what's the catch?

He was waiting for a reply. "I--I love you too, Fang." He looked like he would jump for joy if he had the coordination.

He grabbed me and kissed me, his lips moving quickly against my own, pulling away only to breathe. That would have been perfect if he didn't smell like rum.

He walked, almost ran towards town. "FANG! Where are you going?"

"To celebrate!"

Geez, Fang's a fun drunk.

Third Person POV

Fang, swaying slightly, walked into the town hair salon. "Hair Care for the Future, How may I help you?"

"Give me g-gr-green h-hi-highlights," Fang said.

"Sure sir." Little did our favorite drunk know that this was the worker's first time highlighting hair.

"Oh shoot," the worker mumbled. Instead of highlighting Fang's hair, the young man turned it all lime green.

"There you go sir. Thank you for your business." The worker took the money and shooed Fang before he could see the mistake.

Fang finally made it back to the tree after three tries at finding the correct path. "Fang!" Max gasped. "Your hair!"

"What about it?" he asked, beginning to come back to his senses. Apparently, mutant bird-kids don't stay drunk for long.

"It's green!"

"Whaa?"

Max got the mirror out of Fang's backpack and brought it to him.

"Dear god, what have I done?"

"You might want to get some sleep, shake off the rum. We'll worry about your hair tomorrow. I've got first watch."

Max's POV

Well, Fang's just a walking, talking, flying rainbow now. Maybe I should dye his clothes purple or something next to complete the look.

I can't believe he did that to hid hair though. Drunk or sober, I didn't think he'd be that stupid.

- - - -

Fang woke up about twenty minutes after me. "Man, I've got such a hangover."

"Now you know what I feel like after a brain explosion," I said with a wry smile.

"Ha ha. Funny."

"Do you remember what happened last night?"

"Yes, I'm sorry. I was out of line," he said briskly.

"By getting your hair dyed?" I asked, confused.

"No, by you know, the whole love and kissing thing."

"Fang, I told you that I love you too. And I didn't pull away because you smelled like rum. I don't think you were out of line; I've just been too shy to make a move first and I'm glad you did. And now I'm rambling, so I'm going to shut up." He looked a little embarrassed about his forwardness last night, I just had to make him see. "I'm seriously glad you said that, Fang. Now what should we do about your hair?"

He groaned. "I forgot about that. It will stay in for a while, probably months."

"If I may say so, you deserved it. Stealing my clothes and making me wear heels! Humph."

"Well, it serves you right for making me play Truth or Dare!" he fired back.

"So, are we even now?" I asked, dreading the consequences of this prank.

"Of course not. I have to get you back for making me drunk and letting me ruin my hair." I groaned.

To lighten my mood, I said, "Well, Fangy, you're just a walking, talking, flying rainbow aren't you?"

He glared at me. "Don't make me bite you," he warned.

"Bring it," I said, not thinking he would follow through. But of course, being Fang, he just had to walk over and bite me. HARD. On the arm. He was named Fang for a reason, I thought to myself.

We may love each other, but there's no way he'll get away with that.

"Hmm...you don't taste that good. Maybe with a little salt and butter...," he teased.

"You know you're just digging your own grave, right?"

"Meh."

A/N: Good, bad, hilarious, immoral? Lol. Btw, the whole biting thing came from experience. I asked my friend if he wanted me to bite him, he said bring it, so I bit him as hard as I could on the arm. xD I told him he needed butter and salt. :D Mmkay, that wraps up this chapter.

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A/N: This is going to have three pranks in one. I'm too lazy to split it up.

Chapter 6- Every Action Has a Consequence

Iggy's POV

Oh my god. This is Max's diary. I was just bee-boppin' along and found it in a backpack. Hmm... to pick the lock or not to pick the lock, that is the question.

Of course, I chose to pick the lock. Since I can't see to read, I took it to Fang. There's bound to be something mushy about him in it. Oh, how fun torturing Max is!

"Hey Fang, read this."

"What is it?" I could tell by his tone that he was confused.

"Max's diary." He didn't need to be told twice. We walked away from our tree and sat away from the others. He quietly read everything to me. Now, I won't bore you with the details, but it pretty much went like this.

'Fang is sooo hot! I love him! He loves me too! This is great! I saw a hot guy today. Fang could kick his butt though. And he probably would too. I wouldn't be able to live without my Fang.'

Everything went back to hot guys and Fang. Gag. Me. Now.

I heard Max come up behind me. Oh crap.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT? No, better question, who picked the lock?"

I bowed my head guiltily. "Iggy! You're dead!" she shrieked.

I got up and ran away as quickly as I could. I hid out in a tree for around two hours.

I heard Fang coming, so I jumped down, knowing it would be safe.

"IGGY!" Crap. Spoke way too soon. I heard Max running towards me. I turned to run, but Fang grabbed me by the shoulders and held me in place.

"Fang? What are you doing?"

"Helping Max." God, he is so whipped. Ka-chsch!

Max came up and dumped what tasted like chocolate pudding on me. But was that enough? Of course not. Then she kneed me in the crotch. I went down, holding myself.

"Ugg. I feel like pudding. Pudding with nerve endings. Pudding in great pain," I managed to groan out.

I heard Max and Fang laugh. "That's for stealing my diary and picking the lock. Humph."

"But what about Fang?" I said, not caring about the pain anymore. Why didn't she do this to him?

"I've taken care of that." I bet she's smirking. I bet she made-out with him. Gross.

I got up after a few more minutes and got cleaned up. Pudding tastes great, but it's no fun when you're wearing it.

A/N: This was really short, so I'm writing another short prank.

Ari's POV

I can't believe him! He took my gameboy! Just because I morphed in public, Dad took my gameboy! Oh, he'll pay.

I got the necessary materials and set up my prank.

I hid under the table that's upstairs so I could get a good look of what was happening.

Dad opened the door, making a bucket of water empty on him. Stumbling blindly, he stepped on the skate I planted and fell down the stairs. He went face first into the liquid glue.

I had trouble muffling my laughs. And it wasn't even over yet! Joy!

Jeb's POV

Ari. That boy. I can't believe he did that.

I went into the washroom to clean the glue off of myself. After twenty minutes of scrubbing I finally got it all off me.

I went downstairs to rest in my favorite chair. But when I sat down, a noise interrupted the silence. With a startled look, I realized it was a whoopee cushion.

Damn that kid, always doing this to me. I don't know whether to get this to stop by giving him what he wants (his gameboy) or by punishing him, which could be potentially dangerous to my health.

Oh well. I'll figure it out tomorrow. Rest now.

Ari appeared from behind the couch looking very amused and pleased with himself.

Kids.

A/N: Well? Should I go back to having this only include Max and Fang pranking each other, or should I keep it open? Your call, I'm just taking orders.

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A/N: Well. Here.

Chapter 7 - Gsmh'd N;ph

Max's POV

Okay. So making out with Fang wasn't the best revenge, but I do have a plan.

I lead the others to the town library--plenty of computers. I told Fang to look for any important info. The others went off by themselves.

I sat down at a computer away from Fang so he couldn't see what I was doing. I pulled up the Blogger homepage.

It's a good thing he uses the same name and password for everything. Nudge told me what it was when he first started the blog.

I typed in sinistersilence for the username and fang2d2 for the password. Hmm I wonder where he got that from.

Aha! I started to write a blog entry.

Blog Entry:

Yo. I finally have time to update. Life's been pretty hectic lately. Now to tell you what's happened.

Max dyed my wings pink. Won't come out for like six months. I got drunk and dyed my hair lime green. I know, smooth.

Okay, I think I like Max. A lot. Maybe even love her. She told me she loved me too. Awesome, huh?

Ok, I'll admit it: I act tough to impress Max. I try to make myself look hot and manly.

But dang, she's good at seducing me. I know I've drooled over her before. I think she might have caught me once or twice too.

Well, that's pretty much it.

Fang out.

-Fang

Pretty good huh? I think I managed to sound enough like Fang.

I logged out of his account and got into mine so I could comment. When I finished, I went over to Fang and said "I posted a comment on your blog. Check it out."

He nodded and signed in. As he read "his" blog entry and my comment, his eyes widened.

"What the heck? I didn't write this."

"Then who did? Don't be embarrassed that you drool over me. Oh and you don't have to act tough to impress me." With that said, I walked away, looking for the others.

We headed out of the library to get some dinner. Another night of dumpster-diving. Joy.

I caught Fang glaring at me as we ate. He must think I wrote that blog entry. Now where would he get an idea like that?

At least I made sure I got them out before he could delete the post. Heehee. That was so fun.

I rented a single room for us at a cheap motel. Hey, it had two beds and a cot. That worked out perfectly for us. You won't hear me complaining.

We stacked and tapped and I sent the kids to bed.

You may have one the battle, but you haven't won the war, Maximum.

What? The voice was talking to me about this? Maybe someone should tell me this again, but slower.

Max, this is a distraction, but since I can't stop you, I suppose I'll help you.

WHAT?!

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A/N: Here's more. You people scare me. A lot.

Chapter 8 - A Pumpkin!

Fang's POV

Max is pure evil. I can't believe she hacked into my account on Blogger! How did she get the password anyway?

Oh crap. I just realized I forgot to delete that post before we left the library. Grreeaatt.

Oh double crap. I left Max's combat boots in that tree. I'm so dead when she finds out!

I'll just deal with that later. Right now, I have to get the stuff for my next prank.

We stopped at a store to stock up on the necessities. Using the little cash I had saved, I bought some extra strength Nyquil and a pumpkin suit.

I managed to get it out of the store before the others saw. We decided to sleep in a motel again tonight. Max only got one room to give the MaxRide card a rest.

I gave Max a coke with Nyquil in it. In less than 5 minutes, she was out like a light. The others soon followed her into dreams of rainbows and ponies. Or something like that. I wouldn't know.

I slowly got the pumpkin costume out of my bag, trying not to make any noise. I carefully slipped it on Max, making sure to tie it so she couldn't get it off her.

I grinned evilly. Wait one more thing. I grabbed the camera that Nudge had gotten a while back.

I took several pictures, saving the last ten for tomorrow.

- - - - - -

Max's POV

I woke up feeling...odd. Almost poofy. That was it—poofy! I looked at myself and saw that I was wearing a freakin' pumpkin suit! Fang is so dead. I tried to get it off, but I couldn't. Damn him, he fixed it so I couldn't even unzip it a little.

I saw a flash and whirled around to see Fang holding a camera. He got nine more pictures before I could do anything. That jerk.

"FANG!"

"Yea?" he asked, emotionless as ever.

"What the heck did you do?"

"Apparently you're mistaken. I didn't do anything." So he's using my own innocence act against me, huh?

"You're dead. I hope you know that."

He grinned. "I know."

"Are you going to help me get this off?"

"Nope. Don't know how. Looks like you're stuck dressed as a pumpkin." He gave me a look that said, 'Because that's not a problem.'

Hey Voice? Got any prank ideas yet?

Of course, Maximum. I'll tell you in a few minutes.

Why not now?

Because Ari is coming with Erasers in 3-2-1.

As soon as the voice finished, Ari and about fifteen Erasers came through the door. Dang. I have to fight them in heels, dressed as a pumpkin. Joy.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Hey guys. Sorry I didn't update yesterday. Uhh yeah, that's pretty much it. Please review.

Chapter 9 - Mind Control

Max's POV

Okay. Not the best way to fight Erasers, but whatever. The heels had a nice plus, though. Just step on a dog boy really hard. It was almost like a game.

I saw Fang whisper something to Angel. She nodded and got a serious look on her face. I assumed he told her to do something to an Eraser.

The next thing I knew, I was walking over to an Eraser and spinning him around. I couldn't control my own body. Dammit!

I kissed him. Right on the lips. Okay ew. Why was Angel making me do this? This is so gross! The Eraser wrapped his arms around me and kissed me back. Oh god. Ew, ew, ew, ew!

After what seemed like an hour (which was really about a minute) he pulled back. "Wow Maximum. I didn't know you had a thing for Erasers," he said with a suggestive wink.

I wanted to say, 'Believe me, I don't.' But of course, I couldn't control myself. So I said "I do."

He called off the other Erasers, saying he would be back for me later.

"Okay. Nasty." I ran into the bathroom to scrub my mouth clean. When I got back, Fang was rolling on the floor with laughter. So that's what that little...thing told her to do. He's dead now that the voice is helping me.

I glared at Fang, making him shut up.

"Angel, sweetie. Come here." She walked over slowly, her head hung in shame.

"I'm not going to yell, don't worry. Just...don't listen to Fang when he tells you stuff like that okay?"

"Okay, Max," she said brightly.

So, Voice? Any ideas?

Yes. You should find another place to stay since the head Eraser thinks you like him. You should stay far away from him.

Okay... But you better give me some ideas soon.

Don't worry. I have plenty of tricks up my sleeve so to speak.

Perfect. Fang will pay.

Sorry it's so short. Please review. They make me happy.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Umm...here. The Prank War is officially open. -Evil grin- Oh, Don't think I'm insulting band geeks. I'm one myself, so yeah. Don't hurt me over this.

Chapter 10 - Beasty

Max's POV

Alright, Voice. We're about 500 miles away now. Can you tell me your ideas?

Of course, Maximum.

I'm actually starting to like the Voice now. We walked along the sidewalk in a random town we landed in. I saw a pair of drumsticks lying on the ground. Weird, huh? Oh well. I stuck them in my back pocket. Wow, now I look like those weird band geeks on TV.

So..?

Why don't you sit down on that bench? I have quite a few ideas. It could take a while.

Ok... I thought warily. This better not be a trap.

"Yo. Let's sit here and rest for a little while." The little ones agreed whole-heartedly, while Iggy looked suspicious and Fang just looked hot. Ah! I did not just think that. Oh god, I'm turning into a girly girl!

Max, focus. So what if you replace his clothes with a skirt and a low cut blouse?

Oh my god. That would be hilarious! But, we don't exactly have enough money to buy that stuff.

I could've sworn I heard my voice sigh.

Okay. How about dying his clothes yellow?

Why yellow? Besides, we don't have enough money to buy that much dye.

I began absent mindedly drumming on Fang's head. He looked annoyed, so I continued with the action.

A geeky looking guy with drumsticks in his pocket came walking by us. Dear god, there's more of 'em! How many band geeks can live in one town?

Quite a few Max.

"Miss, you need to learn how to stay in time. You should practice more. Your drumming is horrible. Maybe you should get a teacher." Apparently this guy didn't know who he was insulting.

I stood up, glaring at him. I walked over to him and raised my foot up. Then, as hard as I could, I kicked him in the groin.

He doubled over, face scrunched up in pain. "Jerk," I said loudly.

I caught Fang's eye and he smirked at me. I blushed. Gah! Why am I acting so girly?

"Come on, guys. Let's go find a nice big tree to sleep in." We walked to the small park and found a decent enough tree. We stacked and tapped.

"I have first watch," I said before Fang could argue. I still have to plan with my voice.

Fang opened his mouth to object, but I cut him off. "No arguing. Sleep."

He glared at me, but obliged.

So Voice what- wait. Do you have a name or a nickname or something? Voice is just so normal. Okay, I'm officially crazy. I'm asking the little voice in my head if it has a name.

Yes, I do.

Well?

You can call me Justin.

Hmm...that seemed to fit. My voice is a know-it-all, and Justin just seems like a know-it-all show-off's name. That seemed perfect.

Okay, Justin. Any nicknames?

Apparently, Voice is one of my nicknames. But, if you must know, Beasty is my other nickname. If you dare repeat that, it won't be pretty.

Of course I won't.

I burst out laughing. Oh gosh. His nickname!

Apparently, I woke Fang. Oops?

"What's so funny?" he asked.

"My voice. I asked if it had a name." He gave me a look that said, 'She's officially crazy.'

"And? What made you laugh so much?"

"its name is Justin. His nicknames are Voice and-and--," I stopped to laugh more.

"What?" he asked, getting annoyed.

"Beasty!" Fang understood my laughter then. He joined me in making fun of the nickname. We almost fell out of the tree.

A pain in my brain silenced me instantly.

I told you not to tell! Oh my god, the voice was whining!

The pain intensified. I brought my hands to my head in a useless attempt to keep my skull in one piece.

Fang held me as I whimpered and whispered words of comfort into my ear.

Eventually, the pain ebbed away, but my anger didn't. That evil voice!

I tried to sit up, but Fang's arms held me to him tightly. "Uh, Fang? It's over now."

"I know." Oh wow. He's holding me because he wants to! Aww!

"I looove you," I cooed out, obviously still loopy from the brain attack.

He looked surprised that I would say that. "I love you too, Max."

I pulled him to me and kissed him on the lips. We stayed like that for what seemed like forever. A voice calling our names made us jump apart, blushing.

"Max? What were you two laughing at?" Nudge asked, sleepily.

Oops. Guess we were too loud. I learned my lesson about Beasty though; I'm not telling any one else about it ever again.

"Nothing, sweetie. Go back to sleep."

"Mmkay."

Fang and I exchanged glances. "Go on to sleep, Max. I'll take the next watch."

"Alright. Night, Fang."

"G'night, Max."

Fang needs a nickname... I've got it! SKITTLES! It'll go perfectly with his green hair and pink wings. I think I just thought of a good prank without Justin's help. Yay! Beware Fang. You WILL be embarrassed.

Good night, Beasty. I thought before drifting to sleep.

Well? Was it good? And if anyone that know me in real life, I don't think Justin's beasty. Justin's a know it all name and Beasty is embarrassing. Just thought I'd clear that up.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Hey guys. Glad you liked the last chapter. Not much happened, but meh. Oh well, you'll live. I hope. If you can, will you go read my one-shot Lips of an Angel? Please? It only has six reviews. Okay then. On with the story. And don't worry. It's far from over.

Chapter 11 - The Finishing Touch

Max's POV

I woke up, fully rested for once. What a nice change. Yesterday came back to me in a rush. I now have the ultimate plan to get Fang back for—whatever it was that he did to me. I can't really remember what started this…

I need some more dye.

I thought you didn't have enough money for dye, Beasty accused.

Uhh... shut up! I didn't ask you! Besides, your ideas sucked. I was trying to let you down gently.

Humph. So that's the thanks I get!

Yep.

He stayed silent. Thank God!

"Come on guys. We're going to the store. We're low on supplies."

"No we're not," Angel disagreed. Ange, it's for a prank. Don't say anything to the others. Okay, sweetie? I thought to her.

"Okay, Max," she chirped.

We packed up camp and headed to the store. What I saw absolutely horrified me. There were tons of band geeks there! This must be like a band geek convention or something! The sooner we get out of this town, the better.

Now, to find the dyes.

Aisle 3, third shelf on the end.

Thanks.

Finally! A little gratitude!

Geez, Beasty is getting more annoying.

Can we just forget about the Beasty thing?

Nope. I happen to like that name.

It's so much fun to torture the voice in my head. And if you don't think that was a weird sentence, you better reread it.

Aha! Beasty is really helpful. I found the dye. The name Beasty will never get old, I thought to myself.

I found the tie-dye and paid. "Guys, we're ready to go now. How about that nice clearing we saw on the way here? It even had a river that we can wash in."

I got some 'yeah's and 'ok's.

We walked to the edge of the town and took off. We flew for about twenty minutes before finding the clearing.

After we landed, I assigned bath times. "Gazzy, you're the dirtiest, so you get first bath. Then Iggy, Nudge, Angel, and Fang. Ok?"

"Sure," they replied in freaky unison.

Forty-five minutes later, Fang headed down to the river to wash. I waited for about three minutes before following him.

I snuck over to the bush where he laid his clothes and grabbed them and ran.

I did my job quickly, but thoroughly. I died every inch of his clothes with the tie-dye stuff I bought. (And yes, that did include his formerly black boxers as well.) If he thought he looked un-Fang-like now...

I put his clothes back before he even noticed. Now all I had to do was wait.

It didn't take that long for him to find his little "surprise." I heard him run up the path.

"MAX! What the crap did you do?"

"Isn't it a little obvious? Should I say it really slow for you?"

"Ha ha. Why did you do this? I look like a rainbow freak!"

"Aww, I think you look adorable in a Rainbow Brite sorta way."

"Har har."

"You know, you're pretty much stuck like that for half a year," I said, grinning.

"Oh don't worry. I have a plan for you," he murmured before walking away.

Oh crap. That's not good.

"Umm, I love you? Will that make it better?"

"Nope!" he called over his shoulder.

Double crap.

You know, I think I have the worst deal here. I'm in a pumpkin suit and wearing heels. This sucks. I don't think Fang will ever give me my regular clothes back. At least he's only stuck like that for six months!

Life sucks.

And I'm completely out of good ideas for pranks.

A/N: Well? Good, bad? What? Here's a little poll question: Who do you feel sorrier for? Max or Fang?

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: This is going to have three pranks in one. I'm too lazy to split it up.

Chapter 6- Every Action Has a Consequence

Iggy's POV

Oh my god. This is Max's diary. I was just bee-boppin' along and found it in a backpack. Hmm... to pick the lock or not to pick the lock, that is the question.

Of course, I chose to pick the lock. Since I can't see to read, I took it to Fang. There's bound to be something mushy about him in it. Oh, how fun torturing Max is!

"Hey Fang, read this."

"What is it?" I could tell by his tone that he was confused.

"Max's diary." He didn't need to be told twice. We walked away from our tree and sat away from the others. He quietly read everything to me. Now, I won't bore you with the details, but it pretty much went like this.

'Fang is sooo hot! I love him! He loves me too! This is great! I saw a hot guy today. Fang could kick his butt though. And he probably would too. I wouldn't be able to live without my Fang.'

Everything went back to hot guys and Fang. Gag. Me. Now.

I heard Max come up behind me. Oh crap.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT? No, better question, who picked the lock?"

I bowed my head guiltily. "Iggy! You're dead!" she shrieked.

I got up and ran away as quickly as I could. I hid out in a tree for around two hours.

I heard Fang coming, so I jumped down, knowing it would be safe.

"IGGY!" Crap. Spoke way too soon. I heard Max running towards me. I turned to run, but Fang grabbed me by the shoulders and held me in place.

"Fang? What are you doing?"

"Helping Max." God, he is so whipped. Ka-chsch!

Max came up and dumped what tasted like chocolate pudding on me. But was that enough? Of course not. Then she kneed me in the crotch. I went down, holding myself.

"Ugg. I feel like pudding. Pudding with nerve endings. Pudding in great pain," I managed to groan out.

I heard Max and Fang laugh. "That's for stealing my diary and picking the lock. Humph."

"But what about Fang?" I said, not caring about the pain anymore. Why didn't she do this to him?

"I've taken care of that." I bet she's smirking. I bet she made-out with him. Gross.

I got up after a few more minutes and got cleaned up. Pudding tastes great, but it's no fun when you're wearing it.

A/N: This was really short, so I'm writing another short prank.

Ari's POV

I can't believe him! He took my gameboy! Just because I morphed in public, Dad took my gameboy! Oh, he'll pay.

I got the necessary materials and set up my prank.

I hid under the table that's upstairs so I could get a good look of what was happening.

Dad opened the door, making a bucket of water empty on him. Stumbling blindly, he stepped on the skate I planted and fell down the stairs. He went face first into the liquid glue.

I had trouble muffling my laughs. And it wasn't even over yet! Joy!

Jeb's POV

Ari. That boy. I can't believe he did that.

I went into the washroom to clean the glue off of myself. After twenty minutes of scrubbing I finally got it all off me.

I went downstairs to rest in my favorite chair. But when I sat down, a noise interrupted the silence. With a startled look, I realized it was a whoopee cushion.

Damn that kid, always doing this to me. I don't know whether to get this to stop by giving him what he wants (his gameboy) or by punishing him, which could be potentially dangerous to my health.

Oh well. I'll figure it out tomorrow. Rest now.

Ari appeared from behind the couch looking very amused and pleased with himself.

Kids.

A/N: Well? Should I go back to having this only include Max and Fang pranking each other, or should I keep it open? Your call, I'm just taking orders.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Umm here. Once again, I'm being forced to write. So...here's more. Impatient little...people.

Chapter 13 - Beware the Band Geeks

Fang's POV

We decided to go back into town in case there was anything we forgot on our last visit. There was this weird band thing going on--there were around a hundred band geeks marching through Main Street. Weird.

Listen up, Fang. Push Max in front of the parade.

Who the hell are you?! Dear god, there's a voice in my head! Is this Max's voice? Beasty, is that you?

NO! I can't believe you would mistake me for that...imbecile! What nerve! I'm Lauren. Now, do what I said.

Why?

Do. It. Now.

No! As soon as I thought that, I lost control of my body. Oh crap.

My body started walking towards Max. Then I pushed her right in front of the band geeks. She looked a little lost. I expected the band to stop since there was a girl there. But no, apparently, they were so focused on their little instruments and their stupid music that they didn't notice her. They just kept marching, stomping on Max.

I tried to move again, but I was stuck. Lauren! Are you doing this?

Of course.

Oh, you are so dead. Look at her. She's all bloody.

And you wouldn't want your precious Max's pretty face to be messed up. I get it.

Shut up! Just let me move!

Whatever.

I fell down. Hard. At least I can move again.

I ran to Max and picked her up.

"Fang! Why did you do that? You jerk!"

"The voice in my head made me!" I defended.

"What? Is it Beasty?"

"No. Someone named Lauren. She freaking controlled me! Let's get you cleaned up."

I sat her down on a nearby bench. I dug around in my backpack for the antiseptic and band-aids. Quickly, but thoroughly, I dressed her wounds.

I picked her up again. "Come on, guys. We're leaving this band geek infested town. They're freaks." I know, the pot calling the kettle black.

"Okay," they said in unison. Freaky. I hate when people say things at the same time.

We took off in an alley behind a music store. Max wriggled in my arms.

"Fang, I can fly by myself."

"No you can't. You're probably dizzy from that trampling." I wasn't about to admit that I liked having her in my arms.

She pouted, but didn't protest.

During the entire flight I stared down at her. Max is so beautiful. I wonder if I impressed her when I was working out earlier.

You did.

Um, how do you know?

I can access any mind I want. All she thinks about is how hot you are. And she thinks you have nice abs.

Hm, I like the sound of that.

Yeah, so anyway Fang, back on track here. Do you have any plans to get back at her for coloring you?

Not really.

Good. I have the best plan ever. It'll get her and Justin good.

Wait. What? Why are you trying to get back at Beasty?

None of your business. But he is so going down! My crazy person can beat his crazy person any day.

Hey! I'm not crazy!

Keep telling yourself that.

I will! God. Now I know what Max feels like. These voices are so annoying! If I could, I'd strangle it or something.

And that would be why you're crazy. Trying to strangle a voice. Humph.

Ack! I'm going crazy already!

We found a cave to stay in for the night. I told Max I had first watch.

"But-,"

"No. You've been taking first watch a lot lately. Go to sleep."

"Fine."

She was asleep almost as soon as her head hit her make-shift pillow. She shivered a little so I put my windbreaker on her.

"Night, Max" I whispered softly.

So, Lauren. What kind of pranks do you have in mind?

Well, I was thinking you could...

A/N: Haha! You guys have to wait to find out. Review. Please?

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Here. -grumbles- Stupid scary people making me write. Hmpf.

Chapter 14 - The Golf Cult

Max's POV

I always knew Fang was crazy! He even has a voice now! Ha!

Be careful Max. Lauren is dangerous.

It's just a voice.

I warned you. It's your funeral.

Well, you can say I told you so at my funeral then.

Fine.

Dang that voice of mine.

Now that Fang has a voice, he'll come up with even better pranks. I am in so much trouble. What the heck will they come up with?

The others eventually woke up, rubbing the sleep from their eyes. Fang wore an evil smirk. Oh crap. Not good.

"Mornin' guys. How about some breakfast?" They nodded their heads eagerly. I got some chocolate poptarts out of my backpack.

Okay, so chocolate is officially the worst thing to feed mutant bird kids. They were bouncing off the walls. Even Fang got hyper. Note to self: Never buy chocolate again.

After getting them somewhat calmed down, we flew on to the next town. We were playing tourist since none of us had ever been to Canada before.

I saw Fang head over to a table. It looked kind of gothic-y. Hmm... I wonder what that's about.

A few minutes later, Fang came back, a small smile on his face. Uh-oh. Not good at all.

"What were you doing over there?" I asked, trying to sound casual.

"Nothing." Could he be any more frustrating?

I sighed and went to look at the postcards. Not that I'd get them, but they had some pretty cool pictures.

There was a tap on my shoulder. I whirled around, expecting an Eraser. Instead, there was a guy wearing golf pants.

"Thank you for joining the golf cult--club. I mean club."

"Uh, I didn't."

"Your boyfriend said you always loved golf and would like to join our cult—uh, club."

"Boyfriend?"

"Yes, that guy right there." He was pointing to Fang. Fang? My boyfriend? Wow. That's the third person that's thought that.

You two do act like a couple.

Do not!

Do too!

Do not!

Do too!

Do not! Oh my god. I'm having a yes/no argument with the voice in my head. Exactly how crazy do you have to be to be given a white jacket?

Don't worry. You're nearly crazy enough,

"Max is it? Well, anyway, welcome to the golf cult. Club, I totally mean club. I'm the president., Barry. So we'll contact you when we're about to have our ceremonies--I mean games. Bye then."

"Well that was freaky," I said, mainly to myself.

I felt the hairs on the back of my neck prickle. I turned to see Fang behind me, shaking with concealed laughter.

"You!"

"Yes?"

"How could you sign me up for a cult?!"

"Um, I didn't know?"

I glared at him.

"The voice made me?"

"Nice try. You did that on purpose!"

"Um, it was an illusion? I didn't mean to? I thought it was the Happy Pony Rainbow Candy club?"

"Uh, no."

He walked away. That little... "Evil jerk."

I rounded up the rest of the flock, trying to get as far away from the creepy cult as I could. We decided to sleep in an abandoned cottage in the forest.

We stacked and tapped.

Voice? I'm ready to listen to your ideas.

Good. So, you could always go with...

A/N: Another cliffy. The Golf Cult will pop up again. They're too much fun to forget about.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Here.

Warning: Extreme hyperness and hilarity ensues.

Chapter 15 - I'm Not Hyper

Max's POV

Morning again. I'm a zombie. No, I'm just half dead. I really need to get more sleep. Nah, I just need a pick-me-up.

Again, we headed into town. The bank card just seemed to have endless money these days. I strolled, yes strolled, over to the food. Hmmm, let's see. What will wake me up?

I picked some popsicles, chocolate poptarts, brownies, cookies, Mountain Dew, and Vault. Something was missing… For good measure, I got a bag of sugar.

I paid, ignoring the look Fang was giving me. We sat down on a bench in a park to eat our breakfast.

I managed to eat all of my sugary good food in under five minutes. Well, except for the bag of sugar. I was saving that for later.

Note to self: Never consume that much sugar at once.

I was talking like Nudge. My mouth was going 100 mph. I almost felt sorry for Fang, who was getting the worst of my ramblings.

"So you know what's a funny word? Saskatchewan. I mean, who names a place Saskatchewan? Oh what about the word bubble? That's awesome. I saw part of this movie, and the girl kept going 'Oh snap!' It was hilarious. And then at the end of the movie, this guy, actually, he looks a lot like you, he said 'and a bag of chips'. That movie was like so dorky that you just had to love it. You know what I want? I want a kiwi. They sound like they taste good. The word kiwi is just so funny. I mean who thinks of this stu-,"

"Max!" Fang said, snapping me back to reality.

"Yeah, Fang?"

"Stop. God, what did you have to make you get this hyper?"

"Only a box of popsicles, fourteen cookies, twenty-three brownies, a couple boxes of chocolate poptarts, a twelve pack of Mountain Dew, and about eighteen Vaults. Why? I'm not hyper."

He simply stared at me, his eyes wide. "You had that much sugar?"

"Yeah, but I'm not hyper. I just needed that to wake me up. I didn't have too much sleep."

"Yes, you are hyper."

"Nuh- uh!"

"Yes, you are."

I was not hyper! But I could see this was going absolutely no where. I didn't argue anymore.

After a while, I was able to sneak off behind a tree. I got the bag of sugar out of my bag and started shoving handfuls of the substance into my mouth.

I heard shuffling behind me. I turned around and saw Fang. He quickly snatched my bag of sugar.

"What was that for?"

"Max. You have to stop. You're too hyper."

"I'm not hyper. Now give me back my sugar. It still has half a bag left in it."

"Uh, no. That would be irresponsible of me."

"Please Fangy? I love you. Can I pwease have the sugar back?" I asked, trying to use Bambi eyes.

He hesitated for a moment, but still said no.

"You evil little foot licker."

"I don't have a foot fetish."

"You're still evil."

"Whatever." With that, he walked away, taking my precious sugar with him.

I had the sudden urge to fly really fast.

"Guys, I'm going out for a little bit. I'll be back; it'll just be a short flight."

I found a secluded spot and jumped into the air, going as fast as I could. Wow. I've never gone this fast before.

Max. Slow down, you're going over 800 mph.

Really? Awesome!

I pushed myself to go faster. After about five minutes, I returned to the Flock.

Fang was looking a little hyper himself. What did he do?

Fang's POV

As soon as Max left, I got the bag of sugar out. I was hungry. A little taste won't hurt me.

The next thing I knew, all the sugar was gone and I was twitching. I started running around the trees.

Max came back a little while later. Uh, oh. She can't see me like this! I was the one telling her she was too hyper.

"Fang, where's my sugar?"

"Um, the sugar fairies stole it?" Ok, that has to be my worst excuse ever.

"Uh huh. Why did you eat Steve?" Ok. WTF?

"Who's Steve?"

"My bag of sugar!" She named her bag of sugar?

"Er, okay. Want some chocolate?" That'll get her to shut up.

I had a few sugary sweets as well. Maybe I was a little hyper.

"Doesn't that tree look funny?" Max asked.

It did! I burst out laughing and couldn't stop. Soon, Max joined me in my hysterical laughter.

The rest of the flock looked at us like we were high.

"Are you guys high?" asked Iggy.

"We're high. Per!" Ok, bad joke, but whatever.

"No more sugar for you guys. Ever."

"But it tastes so good!" I argued.

"No."

I sighed. "Fine." I'll just sneak it.

I curled up next to the already sleeping Max and drifted into dreamland. Get this; I had a dream with rainbows. And ponies. Pink ponies. The horror!

A/N: Well? Good, bad, or completely random?

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

!A/N: Someone other than David finally gave me a suggestion. Yay!

!Chapter 16 - Gorilla Glue!

!Max's POV!

Ugh. I'm never eating sugar ever again. It's like I have a freakin hangover. Actually, I probably do.

Ok. Now, to think of something to do to Fang. Uh... Ok. I'm drawing a blank.

Voice?

Do you have any gorilla glue?

Yea...

Good.

I continued to plan with my voice.

"Ok guys, let's move."

But before any of us could get off the ground, that guy from the Golf "Club" showed up with about fifty other teenagers.

"Ah. We found you Max. We're about to have a ceremony. Uh- match," Barry said.

"Can't you guys just leave me alone?"

"No, Max. Once your name is on the list, you are a part of the Golf Cult forever," he said in a creepy voice.

I shot a look at Fang. He is so dead for that. He tried to act innocent, but I wasn't buying it.

I changed tactics. "Where is it? I'll meet you there."

"By the stream about a mile from here."

"Ok. I'll be there in about twenty minutes."

They all nodded and walked off in the direction of the stream.

"Ok guys. Let's go. Now. Those cult people are starting to freak me out."

We took off, flying away as quickly as possible.

I found an abandoned alley for us to sleep in. I called first watch.

I waited for Fang to fall asleep. Quietly as possible, I snuck over to our supplies bag and got the gorilla glue out.

The strongest glue ever invented. Perfect.

I poured nearly half of the bottle onto Fang's forehead. I lightly wiggled a flower on his head to tickle him. His arm shot up and stuck to the glue.

YAY! Thanks Beasty.

You're welcome, Max.

I woke Iggy for the next watch. I crawled over to my spot beside Fang. Justin was right. We do act like a couple. I'll have to ask Fang about us sometime. Maybe. Meh, I'll get around to it eventually.

- - - - - - - !Morning!

!Fang's POV!

I woke up at around 6:00 in the morning. I tried to stretch, but my right arm wouldn't move. I tried again. Nothing. Crap. Max.

I rolled over to find Max still asleep beside me. I gently shook her with my free hand. She woke up quickly, already alert.

"Max..."

"Yeah?"

"What did you do to my hand?"

"Nothing." I glared. She had to have done something. I can't move my freakin hand.

"Um... the glue bunnies snuck up on me during my watch and poured glue on your head?" Ah, turning my own terrible excuses against me. Might as well play along to find out what I want.

"What kind of glue bunnies?"

"Evil gorilla glue bunnies." Aha! That's why my hand won't move. Stupid Gorilla Glue.

Oh yay for me. I'm a multi colored freak with his hand glued to his head. Just what I always wanted.

"Sure. Well, next time you see those evil gorilla glue bunnies, tell them that I love rabbit jerky. And revenge."

She gulped. Wow. Playing along is fun.

My little Max is not going unpunished for this. My voice has plenty of ideas left.

A/N: So so so sorry I haven't updated. I got grounded. I'll update tomorrow. I hope. Till then...

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Have fun. Jeb/Ari prank time. I'm cold, wet, and muddy, but I still did this for you. So you better be happy.

Warning: Unintentional drug use.

Chapter 17- Letters Of False Love

Jeb's POV

That little scoundrel! He's done it again! Ari glued a dead rat to my earlobe. It. Won't. Come. Off. I'm not even going into details about what I tried. Just trust me, it's stuck there.

Oh, I'll show him. Yes, yes, playing pranks is childish, but this is an emergency. It's the only way to teach him a lesson. I have such an evil little mind.

I walked to my desk and grabbed my pretty purple stationary with the ponies on it. I found my pink glitter pen. I'd rather not discuss why I own these particular items.

I wrote in Max's script:

Ari-

I'm so sorry I was mean to you. It's all a cover up. I don't think Fang would like it if he knew.

You see, I really love you. You and only you. Come get me. Please. I need you.

Sorry about the Flock hurting you. I'll make them stop. Promise.

Can't wait to see you!

Love,

Max

I am absolutely brilliant. I trick Ari AND get Max back. Pure genius!

I strolled casually over to Ari. Well, as casually as you can with a rat swinging from your earlobe.

"Here. This came in the mail for you."

"Me!" he gasped.

I nodded curtly, trying to mask my amusement.

He grabbed the letter and hurried off to his room. Absolute brilliance!

Ari's POV

I ripped the envelope open. I really wanted to see who wrote to me. It was from Max!

I read through it quickly. She really did love me. Yay!

Throughout the week, I got lots of letters from my little Max. My favorite was when she said that I was "so cute and hot". I love her so much now. I'm going to get her as soon as Dad lets me.

I was sitting on my bed, scratching behind my ear. I brought my dog foot down and started licking it. All of a sudden, Max II walked in.

"You little foot licker!"

"Hey!"

"Well, look at you. Your foot's still in your mouth."

It tasted so good though. This would be why I don't like Max II anymore. She's so mean. She's nothing compared to the real Max.

She walked away, probably satisfied that I hadn't answered her.

I went into Dad's office. I was going to ask him if I could leave yet. When I stepped in the room, I saw him writing on note on the same paper and in the same pen Max wrote hers in. I knew it was too good to be true! Dad was writing them all along.

That evil little jerk! He is so dead for this.

"Ari!" Apparently, he wasn't expecting me. Too bad. I'm here and I know the truth now.

I stomped out of his office. I took off into the sky.

I decided I would get him back. It has to be the best prank ever. I thought through my options. I could um put eggs in his shoes. Or maybe I could draw all over his important papers. Whatever I do, it'll be good.

Wait! I got it!

I ran out to the store and got some supplies. I grinned and rubbed my hands together. He'll pay.

I went to my secret clubhouse and stashed my stuff there. I grabbed some of that stuff that guy sold me. They looked like mushrooms. I like these. Hmm...I'll have to ask that guy where he got them.

Walking into my picture room, I noticed a weird shape out of the window. I jumped out the window and flew towards it.

It was... my dad! With wings! What the heck?

I turned around, grabbed my stuff and left. This is starting to get way to freaky for me.

Why did I have to be born into a family of mutant freaks?

Oh well. And if Dad thinks that just because he has wings that he's off the hook, then he has another thing coming.

A/N: Btw, Ari's hallucinating there. Review.

A/N: I forgot who suggested this, but thanks.

Chapter 18 - I'm A Dinosaur!

Fang's POV

Kso, my hand is still stuck to my head. Yay. Payback time. I grinned to myself.

Lauren?

Yea. So, you know how I can control you?

Unfortunately.

I can control anyone.

Even Max?

Even Max.

Ok. So, we might go play Frisbee in the park today. Every time she sees a hot guy, can you make her say "Rowr! I'm a dinosaur!" while chasing him? Please? I can't believe I said please.

Well, since you said please...sure. As long as he keeps his distance.

He?

Justin.

Oh right. Ok... I'll send him a fax about it.

Hey, Fang and Max together makes Fax. Or Mang. But Fax sounds better. I'll point that out to her later. Now, it's time for fun.

Anyway, thanks for helping. Wow. I'm on a roll with the manners thing.

I walked over to Max. "Hey, do you think we could play Frisbee in the park today?" Well, that came out wrong. It sounds like I want to play a game.

"Sure Fang. Sounds fun. Go tell the others."

Max's POV

Well that's odd. Strong, silent, have-no-fun Fang wants to play Frisbee. Wait. Where did he even get a Frisbee? I'll have to ask him about that later.

We walked to the small park nearby. Fang had a neon green Frisbee tucked under his arm.

"Well, here we are guys." I announced.

"I call first toss!" Nudge shouted in my ear.

We got into an awkward formation. Just as Nudge threw the Frisbee, a really hot guy walked into my line of vision.

All of a sudden, I started running -unwillingly- towards the teen. When I got to him, he gave me a look that I couldn't place with the proper emotion.

"Rowr! I'm a dinosaur!" I declared proudly. What the h? I can't control myself. Fang. He's behind this, I just know it!

The guy slowly backed away. But that wasn't enough embarrassment for me, apparently. I started chasing him through the park, weaving through the trees and almost knocking kids down.

"Look chick, just leave me alone! I didn't do anything!" Wow. I really freaked that guy out. This is actually kinda fun.

I continued the chase for another five minutes. I was finally freed. I walked over to the Flock, hoping they didn't notice my little escapade. Alas, Fate was not that merciful.

They were all rolling on the ground, laughing their little heads off. I blushed. Well this is embarrassing I thought to myself.

I "humpf"ed and walked away. But before I could get out of there, another hot guy walked near me. I repeated the dinosaur bit, scaring the poor guy in the process.

He kept repeating "demon child" over and over again. I'm guessing that qualifies as being scared.

I ran back to the Flock with my eyes closed so I wouldn't see any guys.

"Ok. We're leaving now. Right now! Come one people!" I ushered them out of the park and into the sky.

I flew next to Fang and hit him on the back. "What was that for?" he snapped.

"You know what."

His eyes moved nervously and he fidgeted. He flew ahead of me, trying to avoid the lecture he knew was coming. "I'll get you Fang!" I called after him.

Fang's POV

Oh crap. Shoot me now. She has a voice too. It could probably control me. Oh crap. Please. Just kill me now. Death would be far better than this fate.

Ok. So I'm exaggerating a bit, but I really don't want to know what she has planned for me.

A/N: And there it is.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Sorry for the wait. If you want to blame someone, blame my friend for having a pity party/mental breakdown.

Chapter 19 - Rats

Gazzy's POV

I wanna play too! It's not fair. Everyone else is part of the "prank war" as Iggy calls it. I want to prank someone too! But who?

I thought for a minute. Nudge! That's it! Now, what to do...? I thought.

And thought.

And thought.

And thought. Then it hit me, like a really big bomb. She hates rat meat! Mwahaha! All I have to do is get her to eat some. Then, I can be part of the "prank war" too. Yay!

I waited until Max had her back turned. I ran out into the woods and looked for some rats. After about five minutes of looking, I found a nest of 'em. There were about 12 rats. I picked one up and carried it back to camp.

Max saw me and gave me a weird look. "I just wanted to try something new." She didn't look convinced, but left it alone anyway.

We sat around our little fire, roasting various things on sticks. I got a bun out and put the rat meat on it. "Here Nudge. This tastes great." I handed it to her.

She immediately gulped it down. "Wow Gazzy! That is good! What is? I want some more. Please? Mmm it's sooo good!"

I gave her more and more. She didn't even know it was rat. I grinned.

"So Gazzy. What is that stuff?"

"Rat meat."

She gagged. She ran off to a tree. I guess she wanted to get the rat meat out of her system.

When she came back, she was red in the face. She plopped down next to me. "Ooh! I'll get you for that Gazzy!" she whispered in my ear.

Then she whacked me upside the head. "What was that for?" I cried out.

"You know what."

I humpfed and turned away, trying to hide my smirk.

Maybe I could wreak more havoc tonight.

In Fang's voice, I said "Max. I love you. Kiss me now."

Even though she was confused about the randomness of it all, Max leaned over and kissed him. Fang was really surprised, but kissed back. Heehee. This is fun.

Then, in Iggy's voice, I said "Fang! How could you? I thought what we had was special! How could you cheat on me with a girl?"

In Nudge's voice I squealed. "IGGY! You told me I was the only one that you loved!"

Utter chaos ensued. Heehee I love that phrase. Max looked extremely uncomfortable, thinking Fang cheated on her with Iggy. Iggy thinking Nudge liked him. And of course Fang, thinking that Iggy thought he was gay. That was fun.

It ended up taking them twenty minutes to figure out that I was the one who said all that stuff. "GAZZY! Apologize right now!" Max yelled.

"Sorry guys. I just wanted to be in the prank war too."

Max's eyes softened. I always know how to work the 8 year old charm. Oh yea.

"It's ok Gazzy. Just don't do it again. Ok?"

"Okay, Max." I will I added in my head. That was way too much fun not to do it again.

Maybe I could have more fun tonight.

I waited until everyone but Max and Fang were asleep. Fang leaned in and kissed Max on the lips. Gross!

"Max, I" I interrupted him. "Want you to lick my foot for me. I got something right there in between those two toes." I said in his voice. I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing.

Max looked surprised. Boy, she's been doing that a lot tonight. I continued in her voice, "Of course Fangy dear. Anything for the love of my life." She blushed.

"Fang" said "Max, I need to tell you something. I'm "involved" with Iggy. We've had quite a few "escapades".

She gasped. This is fun. "GAZZY!" They shouted in unison.

Max got up and pulled me out from my hiding place. Rats. I was having fun. "Bed. Now."

I sighed and went over to my spot.

Max' POV

"Soo, Fang. You're not really gay are you?" I asked, trying to sound casual.

He stared at me. "You didn't believe that did you? Come on Max. You of all people should know I'm the farthest thing from gay here. Iggy might be, but I'm not."

"Are you sure?" I asked. I was really just trying to get him to kiss me.

"I'll prove it to you." He leaned in and gave me a um very heated kiss. Eventually it escalated into a make-out session. Not that I minded or anything.

But in the little part of my mind that wasn't enjoying our make-out, I was plotting my revenge.

I had a lot of fun with that chapter.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Please. Just don't hurt the Vault truck.

Warning: Brief half nudity.

Chapter 20 -Backfire

Max's POV

I figured out the perfect revenge for Fang, without the help of Beasty. The kids would be ecstatic about it.

We were huddled together in a cave. It was storming outside. Do I sense deja vu? Now was the perfect time to put my plan into action.

"Who wants to play Truth or Dare again?" Everyone but fang shouted 'me'. "It's settled then. Who wants to go first?"

Angel raised her hand. "Ok Ange. Go ahead."

"Um Max. Truth or dare?"

From experience, truth is always the best choice. "Truth."

"Ok. What's the first thing that comes to mind when I say Fang?"

I answered without thinking, "hot." By the time my brain caught up with my mouth, it was already too late. I blushed a deep red.

Well, at least it's my turn now. "Ig. Truth or dare?"

He bravely picked dare. "I dare you to eat some of that moss over there." He made a disgusted face, but complied.

"Fang. Truth or dare?"

Fang being Fang, picked dare. Yay! My plan's working!

Iggy leaned over and whispered in Fang's ear. What's he saying? Gah! I want to know!

Fang blushed slightly. Yay! That means it's a good one.

Fang got up and walked toward me. I backed away from him, hitting the wall. I had no where else to run.

Suddenly, Fang tripped on a rock. He hurtled towards me. His face -get this- landed right in my boobs. Right in the middle of 'em. How perfect could his aim be?

I tried to push him off of me. He was fighting against me. That little perv! I finally knocked him to the ground. He was sporting a nice shade of red, as was I.

"Go on, Fang. Do the dare." Crap. That wasn't the dare. Aw man!

He walked to me, bringing his arms around my torso. His lips came crashing down on mine. He licked my lower lip, silently asking for entrance. I opened my mouth willingly enough. His tongue searched my entire mouth, massaged my tongue.

Then, I felt Fang's warm hands behind my back. He slipped that stupid pumpkin costume off of me. Finally! Then I felt his hands inside my shirt. I didn't really think too much about it until I heard a pop. My bra came off and I was "free". He stepped back, smirking.

Oh! That terrible little...bugger! How did my trick backfire? Oh man. It's his turn now! How did I get myself into this? I groaned.

"Max. Truth or dare?" he asked in a calm tone.

Might as well try dare once. "Dare."

He grinned evilly. Uh-oh. "Ok. Max, I dare you to-" he lowered his voice to a whisper and leaned closer "flash us."

"Oh no. Oh hell no." I didn't really care that I was cursing in front of the others.

"Yes. You have to."

He was right. Stupid dare. I mentally told Angel to look away. I gathered up my courage and pulled up my shirt. As soon as I did, I saw a flash. Oh. My. God. Fang had a camera. And he got that on film. Darn him.

I pulled my shirt back down quickly. Stupid Fang. He dangled the camera in front of me.

I charged at him, trying to get the wretched thing. He sidestepped just as I was about to get it. Dang! I smashed into the cave wall.

He chuckled at that. I was getting angrier by the second. I ran up to him and slapped him. Hard. Right across the face.

He looked stunned. Actually stunned. Not Fang stunned. "You deserved it," I mumbled. Well, he did.

He just shrugged. I tried to reach for the camera again, but he stuck it inside his boxers. "You can get it anytime you want to Max." Oh! The only way to get rid of it is to reach into his pants. There was no way in h-e-double hockey sticks that that was gonna happen.

I sighed in defeat. The kids continued with the game, while I tried to think of more ways to get back at Fang.

Fang's POV

Heheh. That was both enjoyable for me and embarrassing for Max. We should do this more often. I need to get that film developed soon...

Good or bad?

A/N: Thanks for the suggestions. Keep 'em comin'. Ack. I'm sooo sorry I haven't updated in so long. Stupid writer's block.

Chapter 21 - Photos

Fang's POV

We packed up camp early in the morning. While in the air, Iggy started singing a really weird song.

"L is for the way you look tonight..." It went on and on and on. It was nearly as annoying as The Song That Never Ends. At least he's not singing that I thought. But I thought too soon. He switched songs abruptly.

"This is the song that never ends, yes it goes on and on my friends..." Darn. Shoot me now.

After two hours of Iggy's lovely singing, Max finally told him to shut up. Thank God!

We landed in a town about six hours away from Saskatoon. This is going to sound a little like Nudge, but where the hell did the word Saskatoon come from? Hmm? Seriously. Were these people high on shrooms when they named the places in Canada?

Did you ever realize how repetitive our lives are? I mean really, wake up, eat, fly, fight Erasers, prank each other, fly, sleep in a cave/tree/abandoned building, wake up, etc. We need to add some -dare I say it?- spice to our lives. So let's add developing scandalous pictures and selling them to my list of daily activities.

That's exactly where I'm headed. "Max, I'll be back in a bit. Gotta do some stuff."

I walked through the town and found a Wallgreen's. I quickly walked to the photo developing place. I put my two cameras on the counter.

"That'll be 30 dollars," the clerk said. I handed over the money, not too happy about the high price.

"They'll be ready in an hour," the girl said, throwing a coy smile my way. I swear, girls are so predictable. I bet she's thinking "Oh em gee! That guy is, like, soooo hot. I mean wow! I'm gonna have to call -insert girl's best friend's name here- tonight and tell her the news! I'm going to give him my number."

The Crazy Girl Clerk's POV

Oh em gee! That guy is, like, soooo hot. I mean wow! I'm gonna have to call Jesica tonight and tell her the news! I'm going to give him my number.

Fang's POV

Yea. Pretty much like that. SO. Back on track here.

I walked out the door. I had an hour to kill. What to do, what to do? Just then, I saw Ryan Cooley, my favorite Degrassi character. Yea, I watch Degrassi. It's a freakin awesome show. You diss it, you have to deal with me.

I followed him as quietly as I could. He turned around quickly, discovering me. "Um. Uh...hi. You're my favorite person on Degrassi. Uh. Can you sign my hand?"

He looked a little freaked, but obliged. He even wrote his phone number on my hand. Yes! He walked away, leaving me staring at my hand.

"Wow," I muttered. That was awesome! Yea, emotionless Fang is obsessive about a TV show. What can I say, I'm a closet emo.

I glanced at my watch. An hour had already passed. I ran back to Wallgreen's and got my pictures. As I was looking through them, I noticed a piece of paper.

'Hi there sexy.

My name's Barbie. Call me some time, hot stuff.

327-976-9375.

Hug and kisses!

-Barbie'

Wow. Two phone numbers in one day! Awesome!

I finished looking through the pictures. They were great. I really have a knack for taking pictures of Max shirtless.

I have the perfect plan for those. I put them in my backpack.

I walked back to our little camp. "Hey, Fang. Glad your back!" Max said warmly. She caught sight of my hand.

"Um why is there a guy's phone number on your hand?"

Oh crap. How do I explain this? She thinks I'm gay. Crap.

"You see, I saw Ryan Cooley, the guy from Degrassi. I asked him to sign my hand. He did, but he put his number there too."

"Fang, are you gay?"

"What? No!"

"Do I need to find a closet for you to come out of?"

"No! I'm straight! I'll prove it to you!"

I grabbed and kissed her on the lips. She opened her mouth, inviting me in. Who was I to turn down such a lovely invite?

When we pulled apart, Max announced "ok. I believe that your straight."

Max's POV

I'm so smart. Every time I call him gay, I get a kiss. I like this.

But I still want to know why he got Ryan Cooley's number.

A/N: There. Be happy.

A/N: Violence is not the answer. So, don't be mean to me. Remember, I have the power to never update again. - Ok. Forgive me with the Canada mistakes. I don't live in Canada. Btw, no offense to Canadians. I like Canada. I just pick fun at everything. Ok. Moving on to the story.

Chapter 22 - Conducting Business

Fang's POV

I got stuck with the last watch. It was lonely, but it had its perks. I sat still, watching the sunrise. When it was over, I kicked the flock awake. We dined on delicious power bars and soda.

"Let's move. We're heading to Edmonton today," Max announced. Well that was random, but it'll work.

Angel was already in the air when the Erasers entered our camp. Ari made his way to us, pushing his companions roughly to the side.

"Hello there little birdies. Hiding out in Canada, eh?" His laugh was gravelly. "Hey Max, want another kiss?"

In less than a second, I had thrown myself at Ari, knocking him to the ground. "Alright, Ari. Come to the Holiday Inn in Edmonton at 8:00. I'll give you something you want. Bring money. Now," I whispered, my words laced with venom, "leave. Bring no one else tonight. Got it? If so much as one Eraser lays a hand on any of the flock, I won't hesitate to kick your sorry ass." I got off him and walked back to Max. I really would've loved to beat him to a bloody pulp, but I have a plan for him.

Max looked stunned that I would just leave him alive and unharmed. I gave her my 'I'll explain later' look. She nodded. Of course, I wouldn't really have to explain when she finds out what I'm going to do.

"U and A guys," she called out in strong voice.

We flew for about two hours, stopping at a truck stop for a bathroom break. SOMEONE -cough-Nudge -cough-, forgot to go before we left camp.

I got some change out of my pocket and walked to the phone booth. I dialed the number I found next to Sam's name in Max's old notebook.

"Hello?"

"Is Sam there?" Yes, I was calling Sam, the guy Max dated back when we lived with Anne.

"Speaking."

"Sam, this is Nick Walker, Max's brother."

"Oh?"

"Yea. Is this your cell phone?"

"Yea..." I had to make sure he wasn't at home.

"Are you any where near Edmonton? The one in Alberta, Canada."

"Actually, I'm at the Holiday Inn."

"Good. Meet me in the lobby at 8:00. I have something you might want."Well that sounded like I kidnaped a family member.

"Ok."

"Oh, why are you in Canada anyway?"

"Fall break at school. I'm visiting family."

"Oh. Well, bye." I hung up quickly. That was awkward, but it had to be done. My plan was in motion. I resisted the urge to rub my hands together like the bad guys in cartoons.

We continued our flight, landing in a shady spot behind the Holiday Inn. Max walked up to the desk, the rest of us trailing behind her.

"Sorry, hun. We only have two rooms," the receptionist said, smacking her bubble gum loudly.

"That's fine." She paid and led us to our rooms.

One room had two beds, the other only had one. Iggy, Gazzy, Nudge, and Angel called the bigger room. Which left the single bed for Max and I to share. I glanced at the clock. 7:55. Better get down to the lobby. I grabbed the pictures and put them in my pocket.

"Max, I'm going to the lobby. Be back soon."

I walked down, quickly spotting my new clients.

"What's this about, freak?" Ari snarled. Thank God he hadn't morphed.

"Chill. I have some picture I'm willing to give you. For a price."

"What kind of pictures?" Sam asked.

I pulled out the pictures of Max. Her in the pumpkin suit and her shirtless. Their eyes widened.

"How much?" they asked in unison.

"Hmm...I'm thinking thirty bucks. What say you?"

"Deal!" They said. They forked over the cash. I handed them their pictures, keeping some for myself.

"Yo, thanks, Nick."

I nodded and he walked away.

"Hey Ari, you might want to go before Max sees you and freaks out." He growled, but walked out the door.

This is awesome! I get revenge AND money! Yes! I started doing a happy dance. I was really movin' too. I had my arms going around in circles, my feet shuffling. I had it going on. Then I heard a giggle. I froze. Max was standing there, a video camera in her hands. Crap.

She ran back to our room, me chasing after her. She went into the bathroom. God knows what she was doing. She came out without the video camera.

I glared at her. She simply smiled. I love her, but she's not excused from her punishment. I will win this war!

A/N: And there's Fang's famous Happy Dance. - This was a tad bit longer than usual. But not by much. Review.

A/N: I suppose I should address certain issues. Fang spilt up the pictures. He had some of Max shirtless and some of her in the pumpkin suit. Yes, I know Ari is Max's brother. And so does Fang in this story. That's why he gave Sam some shirtless pics and Ari only got the pumpkin suit pics. Yea. Just clearing that up. Ok. On with the story.

Warning: Contains brief nudity and embarrassment

Chapter 23 - Duh!

Gazzy's POV

Well the whole voice thing was fun, but I wanna do something...bigger. Yea! Hmm...Max still has some leftover glue. I grinned. I got the best plan ever!

I'll probably need Iggy's help though. I walked over to him and tapped his shoulder. "Yea, Gazz?"

"Iggy, I need your help."

"With what?"

I explained my entire plan. The glue, the shirts.

"Simple, but brilliant! I'll go get their shirts."

"Thanks Ig."He walked off, leaving me to get the glue.

A few minutes later, he came running back, Max and Fang's shirts in his hands. He handed 'em to me. I quickly put the glue on the backs.

"Here Ig. Now, just get them to put them back on, and I'll take care of the rest."

Max' POV

Weird. Iggy said he needed my shirt for something. Looked like he had Fang's too. Hmm... I swear, if he blows them up, I'll kick his scrawny white ass from here to Colombia. (A/N: Colombia because of the drugs. Lol)

He came back about fifteen minutes later. Since he had my only shirt, I was wrapped up in an old blanket.

"Here, Max," he said as he handed me my shirt back. He left. I got up and slipped my shirt back on, adjusting it to fit more comfortably. I saw Fang and walked over to him, planning on surprising him with a kiss.

I saw Gazzy running towards us. He pushed my back to Fang's. I tried to move, but I was stuck.

"GAZZY!" Fang and I yelled.

He just giggled and ran back to Iggy. They were wearing matching smirks. Oh crap. How am I suppose to get out of this mess?

Fang's POV

Ok. Hour seven of being stuck to Max. I really have to pee. I mean really, really bad. Sure, I'm a super-mutant, but I don't have THAT strong of a bladder.

I kinda start bouncing up and down. Crap. Max noticed.

"Fang? What are you doing?"

"Um...I have to go."

"Go where? Do you have a date? With someone other than me?"

"NO! I have to go."

"OH! Then how can we get out of this?"

I brain-stormed for a little while. They took our shirts, we put them on, we got pushed together, and now we're stuck. DUH! We just have to take our shirts off!

"Max, we just need to take our shirts off."

"But, I um don't uh have my bra on," she mumbled.

Even better, I thought to myself. "I won't look." Much I added mentally.

I took my shirt off first, not bothering to mention the fact that she was free now. Apparently, she didn't notice. She shed her shirt, taking off in the opposite direction before I could get a good look in. Damn.

She must have gone to get a new shirt. Well, I guess I could punish Gazzy while I had some down time. I found him and Iggy laughing over some private joke.

"Ig, Gaz. You're in trouble now."

They each paled and ran. I gave chase, starting to enjoy myself. I had them cornered. Almost. Max came over.

"Fang! Quit scaring them!"

She grabbed them by the arms and hauled them away, most likely to give them a stern talking to. She needs to get more violent with them. Violence is always the answer.

A/N: That's all for now. Sorry the squirrel thing wasn't in this chapter, Itchy. But it'll be in chapter 24. Don't worry.

A/N: Here's the squirrel thing. Ha. Funny story about the squirrel thing. If you ask, I'll tell you about it.

Warning: Adorableness and closet emo-ness. Fang's most likely OOC.

Chapter 24 - Squirrel

Max' POV

Yes, I do know that Fang sold those pictures of me. I think he could've gotten more though... I have my revenge. But you know, this whole pranking Fang thing is starting to get old. Plus, I'm running out pranks. I 'hmm'ed in thought.

I had hidden the video camera of Fang's happy dance in my bag of um girly items. Earlier this morning, Fang searched through said bag, looking for the video. But pf course, I had already moved it. I heard him groaning to himself about how terrible it was going through all that girly stuff and not even finding his prize. Serves him right is all I have to say.

I suddenly remembered that Fang never gave me my boots back. He probably left them in a forest somewhere. I'll show him. I crept over to his backpack in search of good blackmail material. I dug through it, finally finding something. A journal! Oh snap! Fang has a diary!

To read it or not to read it?

Max. I know this is completely morally wrong, but I think you should read it.

Wow. I'm starting to like you more and more.

If it's even possible, I swear my voice smiled.

I quickly opened it to the first entry. Nothing much. I scanned through it and moved on to the next one. Finally, I found yesterday's entry.

Journal Entry:

Dear Journal (NOT Diary!),

I sold the pictures of Max yesterday. Course, I only gave Ari the ones of her in the pumpkin suit. That would be nasty since supposedly they're siblings. I made sixty bucks! It freakin rocked!

Ok. On to the more serious stuff. I really like Max. But sometimes, it's like she doesn't really notice me. I'm just there. The tough guy that doesn't talk. I only act that way to impress her. But on the inside, I'm confused. I know I love her, but I'm not sure if she knows that. Gah! Why is life always so confusing? Anyway, thanks for listening Dia- I mean Journal. You're like my best friend (except for Max). You know, I want a taco right now..,

-Fang

AKA The Closet Emo

AKA Mr. Tough Guy

AKA Nick

AKA I need a name other than Nick

End Entry

AWW! How adorable! Closet emo. Ha. I looked through his bag once more to see if there was anything useful to me. I came upon what looked like a stuffed squirrel. Weird.

I pulled it out of the bag. Then, I heard running behind me. I turned to see Fang, coming towards me. I stuck the squirrel in my hoodie pocket.

"Max!" Fang whined. Whoa. Back up. Fang whined?

"What?" I asked innocently.

"Give Mr. Bushytail back!"

"What?"

"My squirrel," he answered simply.

"Why should I?" It was too cute for Fang to have.

"GIVE ME MY DAMN SQUIRREL!" he said with a sudden flare of anger.

My eyes went wide and I hurriedly tossed him the stuffed squirrel. He caught it and hugged it to him. Whoa. He's breaking tons of Fang rules here.

"Um yea, so Fang. I was just going to get some fruit bars. Want any?"

"Sure. Strawberry." I backed away slowly from this surreal sight. When I couldn't see him anymore, I turned and ran to my stuff. This was too weird.

Maximum... You can't really believe that Fang has no emotions. He's a person too.

I guess you're right. It's just a little weird.

I went up to Fang.

"Sorry I stole your squirrel. It was just so cute and cuddly. What did you say it's name was?"

He seemed to have regained his cool by then. "Um. Nothing. This is um Angel's. Not mine. I have no clue what it's name is."

"You don't have to act tough for me, Fang. I love you just the way you are. You make a cute closet emo." I winked and walked away. Completely weird for me to do that, but hey, love makes you do crazy things.

A/N: There it is. It completely OOC and random, but it's here. Hope you liked it.

A/N: Now, leave me alone, Itchy!

Chapter 25 - Truce?

Fang's POV

I can't believe Max saw Mr. Bushytail. And she called me a closet emo. What was that about?

So, I have two options. One, I could try harder to hide my feelings. Or two, I could tell Max what I think and feel. Choice one looks pretty good, but I know I should open up to Max. Damn my morals.

You two should call a truce.

Long time no hear.

Shut up and listen.

Fine.

You should call a truce. I know you're running out of prank ideas. So is Max. Team up and prank the rest of the flock. It'll be more fun.

Why? Are you out of ideas too? Why did your motives suddenly change?

That's none of your business, my voice snapped.

Ok, ok. Back off. I'll go ask.

I got up from my spot on the ground and walked over to Max. I gently shook her shoulder to get her attention.

"Max? We need to talk."

Max's POV

"Max? We need to talk."

Oh God. Not good. Those are the last four words any girl wants to hear. Maybe he's going to leave me. Or tell me I'm ugly and that he doesn't want me anymore. I started to hyperventilate.

"Max? It's ok. Nothing bad. I just think we should call a truce. I -well my voice- has a plan. It'll be fun.

Thank God!

"Ok. Deal. What the plan."

"Let's shake on it first." Did he really think I would break this truce? As if. I don't want to face his wrath. Again.

"Fine..." I sighed. He took my small hand in his rough, warm one. He let go after a prolonged moment.

"So what's this brilliant plan of Lauren's?"

"We team up and prank the other members of the flock. What do you say?"

"It has potential... What do you have in mind?"

"I say we start with Iggy." He leaned in to whisper the rest of the prank.

"I like it. I like it a lot. We should go get the supplies tomorrow."

"Yea."

"Hey Fang?"

"Yea?"

"What did you ever do with my boots? I'm still walking around in heels you know."

His eyes darted back and forth suspiciously. What did he do?

"Fang..." I said in a serious voice.. "Tell that truth."

"Maybe I might have accidently left them in a tree back rural Wisconsin somewhere. Maybe," he said nervously.

"Fang! You dork! You better buy me new boots!"

"Why should I?"

"Because I have a tape of you doing a happy dance in the lobby. AND I have your diary hostage."

"What? Dammit Max! Why did you steal my di- journal?!"

"Aww, Fangy. It's hot when a guy keeps a 'journal'. Don't worry. I only read one entry. Now, you better get me those boots. I have connections. And I happen to know some random girls who would LOVE to get their hands on that stuff and post it on the internet."

"Damn. Fine. But I'm not happy about this. Let's just get some sleep. We need to be well rested for tomorrow's activities."

"Night Fangy."

"Night Max." He leaned over and placed a tender kiss on my temple. "Love you."

"Love you too, Fang."

With that, I fell into a happy dream. The first one in months.

A/N: And there it is. Comment, review. Whatever you wanna call it. Hope you liked it.

Remember...

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: I have nothing to say except that I was bribed with a picture to write this.

Warning: Semi not so nice language.

Second Warning(Cause I'm A Dork Like That) : CATFIGHT!!!!!

COPYRIGHT!!!!!!!!: I OWN THIS PLOT! NO STEALING! NONE! AT ALL! I WILL GET MAD! USE YOUR OWN IDEAS! OR THERE WILL BE TROUBLE! GRR!

Disclaimer: I don't own MaxRide. James Patterson does.

Chapter 26 - Silly Putty Mishap

Fang's POV

I woke up, slightly dazed. Was the truce and mushiness a dream? I walked over to Max and kissed her cheek.

"Can't wait for the plan. It's gonna rock!" Guess that answers my question.

"Yea. We can drop the kids off at a hotel then go buy the Silly Putty." I saw Iggy get up and lowered my voice. "We'll sure get him."

After breakfast, we headed to the next town and got a cheap motel room. It was decent enough. I grabbed Max and we went to the Wal-Mart in town. (A/N: I'm assuming you Canadians have Wal-Marts)

We searched throughout the store, finally finding what we needed. Max payed and we left. On the way to the motel, I saw some skanky looking girls about my age. There was a short bleach blonde, a tall brunette, and a, for lack of a better word, slutty looking red head. The red head walked up to me and handed me a slip of paper. Max noticed and glared at the girl. Red head simply pulled me to her and ground herself into me.

"Call me any time. You'll have much more fun with me than that ugly bitch you let stalk you." Max pounced on the girl, ripping out some of her hair.

"Who the hell are you calling a bitch?! I'm not the one dressed like a slut and practically doing it with my clothes on with another girl's boyfriend!" Oh! Burn! Sizzle! Yea, dorky. But still pretty cool.

Red head slapped Max. Max kicked her.

"CATFIGHT!" I called out. I had always wanted to say that.

I looked around. This was pretty cool. My gorgeous Max practically wrestling with a slutty, yet hot read head. This was awesome.

Red bit Max's arm. Hard. She nearly broke the skin. Max back-handed her and finished her off with a roundhouse kick. That had to hurt.

I helped Max up and we left. That was fun! We'll have to do that more often!

"Gimme that paper," Max demanded.

I quickly obeyed, know that a mad Max wasn't something I wanted to deal with.

Her eyes burned with fury as she read the note. "573-987-0023 Call for a good time. I COME CHEAP! What a who-"

I cut her off. "Max! Don't worry. I would never call her. She's not my type." She visibly relaxed. I grabbed her hand and rubbed soothing circles in it, trying to calm her down. "Hey, at least you won. Now let's get back and prank Ig."

She half smiled. "You're right." I love to hear her say those two little words.

We got back to the motel after a short five minute walk. I pulled Max into the bathroom so we could prepare. I pulled out the Silly Putty. She poured the gorilla glue into the open container. We mixed it up and put the lid back on.

We came out, ignoring the stares the flock gave us. Dear god. They thought we were making out or what was the phrase? That's it. Or making cookies. (A/N: For those that don't understand this phrase, it means um doing it. Yea.)

"Hey, Ig. We picked up some Silly Putty for ya while we were out. I know how much you like it."

"Thanks." He eagerly opened it, not suspecting a thing. He began rolling it around in his hands. He tried to move his hands to do something else, but they were stuck that way.

"What's wrong? What happened?!" he shouted. "Max! Fang! Why?! What did I ever do to you two?!"

"We're just having a little fun," Max replied.

"Fun my a-"

"Language!" Max scolded.

"I'll get you two back for this. I hope you know that."

"Sure, Iggy. Riight," I said, with as much sarcasm as I could.

Max's POV

Boy, Iggy's really mad over that. Oh well, he'll get over it. Eventually. Maybe. I hope.

I don't know what I'm going to do with Fang. He's still semi multi colored. Other girls STILL think he's hot. Geez, what's wrong with the Canadians? The girls are all crazy!

Oh well. I should probably think of another plan for our next trick.

A/N: Done. No offense to ANY Canadians. At all. Canadia is cool. And yes, I know it's called Canada. But Canadia is just too cool of a word not to use. Ha.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Hope you know I'm writing during my day off. I'm not very happy about it, but a promise is a promise. Thanks to the person that suggested this. I just changed it a bit.

Warning: I guess this counts as a warning. There's a reference to IluvCaptainTerror's story Prisoner. It's not exactly what happened in Fang's dream, but it's similar.

Second Warning (Cause I'm A Dork Like That) : MUSHY FAXNESS! AWW!

Disclaimer: This goes along with the warning. I don't own Prisoner. ILCT does.

Chapter 27 - Webcam

Max's POV

I had second watch tonight. I practically had to pry Fang from his position. Eventually, he fell asleep a few feet away from me. Suddenly, I heard a little whisper. I looked around for the speaker. It was coming from Fang.

"I know. I don't know who'll win. Maybe Max, maybe her clone. Mmm...they sure look sexy wrestling in the mud. Max just won! Yes! Wow. I love you to Max. Of course I'll help you untie your bathing suit."

I slowly backed away. So, Fang's having a dream of me mud wrestling my clone. God that's weird.

But you know that you're flattered.

Welcome back, Beasty. So glad to hear you.

Max, you know you like the fact that your boyfriend is dreaming of you.

He's not my boyfriend.

Yet.

What do you mean?

You'll see.

However unwise it was, I spent the rest of the night lost in my thoughts. What could he have possibly meant by yet? Was Fang going to ask me out?

Slowly, the rest of the flock began to wake up. Fang was, surprisingly, the last to leave dreamland. Well, I guess it's not so surprising since he was having such a nice dream. When he finally got up, he walked over to me and kissed my cheek.

"Max, I have something to ask you." I got up and followed him into the bathroom.

"Max. Well, this kinda isn't necessary, because of all that's happened, but...do you want to be my girlfriend?"

I tried to hide my squeal of delight, but I didn't succeed. "Of course," I said, trying to act casual about it all.

Fang pulled me to him and kissed me lips. Can we say aww?!

We walked out of the bathroom with Fang's arm wrapped around my waist. Angel walked over to us and said in a small voice, "is it true you two are dating?"

We nodded our heads, while Angel screamed "I KNEW IT!"

Nudge's POV

Max and Fang just went into the bathroom. Perfect time to set up my webcam. Don't ask how I got it. You see, I saw this guy with one and he left so I kinda just took it and ran. Oops. I wasn't suppose to tell you that. Oh well.

Anyway, I set up the webcam and turned it so it'll only show Fang's front when he flexes in the mirror. Can't have people seeing the wings and all that stuff.

I heard the bathroom door open and Angel scream 'I knew it' really loud. Um ow. That hurt.

I hurried in there to congratulate them. After a few minutes, we all went our separate ways. Fang headed to the mirror to flex, just like I had planned.

After about thirty minutes of admiring himself, he headed out to find Max. I crept in there and got the webcam. The whole time, it was playing everything on this one website.

I got the footage and put it on about twelve other websites and put a link to it in the blog. I think I grinned evilly. I wasn't really paying attention though.

You see, there are tons of Fang obsessed girls that comment on the blog. So I found their emails and sent them the link to Fang's flexing. They quickly emailed me back and said thanks. One even said "Tell Fangy I say hi. And that he's hot. And that I love him. And that he can call me anytime. And that maybe we can make some cookies sometime. My favorite's chocolate chip. Mmm...Fang is an apron. Sexy. Whoops! I drooled on my keyboard. Oh well. Thanks again, Nudge!"

What a weirdo. Why are they so obsessed with him? He's not hot or anything. Now Orlando Bloom, that's hot. But Fang my not hot brother. Can we say ew? It'd be like Gazzy making out with Angel. EW!

Anyways, in a day or so, Fang will get on his blog, find the post and well, probably get mad, but it'll be fun to watch! I love to annoy him. It's almost better than annoying Iggy. And that's pretty fun. I can't wait till Fang finds out what I did!

A/N: Hope you liked it.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: I know. It's been a while. Sorry. I've been busy. I have a life too. So. Here it is I guess. Not really a prank this time. But there is hilariousness. -

Warning: Ari being a little obsessive.

Reference to a Twilight oneshot of mine. When Scrabble Goes Wrong. I own it. Yay!

Chapter 28 - Cookie Mania

Ari's POV

I was so mad at Dad. I mean, he faked love letters from Max and then he stole those yummy mushrooms I got. I planned not to talk to him ever again until he apologizes.

I heard a knock on my door. I grunted in response.

"Ari? I found out something about Max." It was Dad. Trying to win me back with news of Max. He continued. "She has an obsession with cookies. Right now she's on a quest to find the perfect cookie. Maybe she'll notice you if you can help her with that."

He walked out, leaving me to think. I perked up considerably. He thinks I have a crush on her. Ok ew. She's my sister. I love her, but not that way. Those letters did make me feel good though. But it was only cause someone was being nice. At the time, I didn't care that they were supposedly from my sister.

Yea. I've said some...odd things to her. I was just trying to get Fang mad. He's all Max thinks about. If I can provoke him and kill him, maybe Max would come back to me...

Dad probably hates me because he thinks I love her love her. He's probably ashamed of me for it. I only want her attention. Maybe we could be like those brothers and sisters that play board games together...

I have to find the perfect cookie for her! Maxy wants cookies! I ran out of my room and to the kitchen.

"Quick guys! I need cookies! My sister wants cookies!" The cooks gave me weird looks and went back to whatever they were doing before. Fine then.

I practically flew out of the house and headed towards town. I got the address and headed over to the cookie factory.

"I need cookies! And fast!" I grabbed an armful of cookies and headed for the door. A tall, buff man stepped in front of me.

"Sir, you'll have to pay for those."

"Screw you!" I pushed him over and ran out. I went to my secret clubhouse and hid the cookies there. I kept one out to taste. I bit into it. Ick. Too hard. Guess I gotta try again.

I went to a fancy dessert place. I was in and out without being noticed in two minutes. I ate one of my cookies. Too gooey.

"THE QUEST CONTINUES!" I shouted.

I walked around looking for other cookie places. Then I saw a weirder thing than Dad flying (which apparently didn't happen).

This guy with bronze hair was chasing this really big buy with dark curly hair. "EMMETT! SCHMARF IS NOT A WORD!"

"IS TOO!" The big guy, Emmett, yelled back.

"GAH!" From out of no where, the small guy pulled out a torch and a pitchfork. "EMMETT! JUST ADMIT IT! SCHMARF DOESN'T EXIST!"

"NEVER, EDWARD! IT IS A WORD! IT'S THE SOUND A DYING BEAR MAKES!"

So the crazy one's name is Edward. Where the heck do these crazy people come from? Am not "high" again am I?

So. Back to the cookie quest.

I searched high and low for the best cookies. Finally, after two weeks of searching, I found it. It has the perfect crunchiness with the gooey insides. Yay! Now I just have to find Max and give it to her.

Max's POV

Wow. I haven't seen Ari in two weeks. Wonder why not. All of a sudden, I heard the bushes rustling. Ari stepped out with a tray in his hands. What?

I got into a fighting stance. Wait. He hasn't even morphed yet. Why not? What's going on here? He stepped forward and handed my the tray. It had chocolate chip cookies on it!

I looked at them skeptically.

"Gone on, Max. I heard you were on a quest to find the perfect cookie. I find them for you. I want us to be friends. I don't want my sister to hate me..."

I stared at him dumbfounded. So I really am his sister?

Beasty, do you think I should try 'em?

Yes, Max. It's safe. He really does just want you to treat him like the little brother he is.

Ok. But if I die, I'm gonna come back to life and kill you.

I slowly reached for a cookie and bit off a piece. Wow! It really is good!

"I guess we can try. But no more trying to kill me!"

"Deal!" He looks really happy.

"So, I guess I'll see ya around?"

"Yea!"

He left. Well. That was pretty weird. I walked over to Fang.

"What was that about, Max?"

"I have absolutely no clue..." I snuggled up to Fang and fell asleep.

A/N: Not my best, but meh. I liked the suggestion. I tried. Please review. And don't kill me for the not-so-goodness.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Sorry for the delay. I procrastinated, then I got grounded. Here it is.

DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN MAXIMUM RIDE. JP DOES. Nor do I own the Disclaimer, Claimer thing. I stole that from Myrah. FPRIVATE "TYPEPICT;ALTWink"

CLAIMER: I OWN THIS PLOT!

Chapter 29 - A Promise Broken

Max's POV

I walked back to camp dripping wet. Stupid Fang pushed me into a stupid lake. So now, I was wet and smelled like lake water. Ew. He's dead. Yea, we have a truce, but every promise is meant to be broken. Or is that rules?

I got out my girly bag and dug all the way to the bottom. I found my moderate sized make up bag. Now, what do I have? Mascara, white foundation, green eyeshadow, blue eyeliner, and red lipstick. What the hell was I on when I bought this?!

Well, it'll do.

Max, you shouldn't break a truce.

Beasty, we promised not to play pranks on each other. And this isn't a prank, it's revenge.

Very well...

Darn right very well.

Beasty was silent.

I'll have to wait till he's asleep to do this though...

Now that I have my revenge (not prank!) Planned, guess I better change into dry clothes. Then it hit me. This is my only outfit. Iggy used my other set of clothes for a bomb. Well crap.

"Hey, Fang?" He nodded to show he was listening. Back to his old strong and silent type. "Do you have an extra set of clothes?"

He nodded again and dug in his backpack, tossing them to me once they were found. I said a quick thanks and headed behind a tree to change. His black shirt came down to my knees and his pants were falling off my butt. Thankfully, I had a belt. Hmm, my belt's white. It'll ruin the perfect blackness of my ensemble.

I came out from behind the tree, thinking about how comfortable Fang's clothes were. "Hey, Fang? Wanna come to town with me? We need some supplies."

"Sure."

We told the kids we'd be back in a little bit and said that Ig was in charge. I hope they don't give him too much trouble...

While we were walking on the sidewalk, a guy and a girl ran by us shouting at each other.

"GIVE ME BACK MY FREAKIN VAULT, DAVEY!"

"DON'T CALL ME DAVEY!"

"FINE THEN ITCHAY!"

"DO YOU WANT A BLOCK?"

"OOH! How about the ones with letters? They're fun to knock down!"

"THAT'S IT! I'M GONNA BLOCK YOU!"

"NOOOOO!"

"Fine. BUT DON'T CALL ME DAVEY OR ITCHAY!"

"WILL YOU GIVE ME MY VAULT?"

"NEVER!" The boy erupted into fits of maniacal laughter. I think we can all proudly say 'Wtf?'

The two slowed to a walk and started talking about gay flutes and straight saxes. Fang went over to the guy. "You two okay there?"

"INSANITY SQUAD FOREVER!" they yelled in unison, sprinting away from us.

Fang and I exchanged similar looks of confusion then burst out laughing. Why do we always run into freaks? I mean people that are freaky, not mutant freaks. Well, you get the point.

We finally managed to get the groceries without anymore interruptions. When we got back to camp, I passed out food bars and we wolfed 'em down. Soon, everyone was asleep, including my victim. I mean Fang.

I got out the crazy make-up and tiptoed to Fang's sleeping form. I did my work quickly and thoroughly.

I put away my tools and stood on watch duty, waiting for Fang to wake.

At about five in the morning, the flock woke up, laughing upon the sighting of Fang. He looked around, anger clear in his eyes. "Who the hell did this?"

Everyone shook their heads. His gaze shifted to me. "We had a truce!"

"Yes. I didn't break it. We promised not to prank each other. That, m'dear, was revenge for pushing me in the lake."

Fang got a mysterious glint in his eye.

"This changes everything, you know."

Oh crap. I think I just started another Prank War.

A/N: Sorry to the reviewer that said "this is the fic that never ends", but I'm still going to chapter 50 on this. If you don't like it, then you might wanna stop reading. My plans won't change.
To the person that reviewed chapter 5 and said they quit cause it was too OOC (even though you're probably not reading this), I did say in the first chapter that it would be OOC.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Sorry this took so long. I had computer troubles.

Disclaimer: I don't own Maximum Ride. JP does. I also do not own the Disclaimer, Claimer thing. I stole that one from Myrah. (I ADMIT IT! DON'T HURT ME! I GAVE YOU CREDIT: )

Claimer: I own this story, this plot, Beasty's name and backstory, Lauren, and the Golf Cult. ALL MINE!

Chapter 30 - In A Truce No More

Fang's POV

As soon as I could, I took some soap down to the stream and cleaned my face. I scrubbed and scrubbed, trying to rid myself of the girliness.

When I was pretty positive I no longer looked like a clown gone wrong, I dried my face and headed back to camp. Angel run up to me. "Fang, are you okay?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" I asked, puzzled.

"Well, you look like a mix between Jake Richardson and a raccoon," Nudge said.

"Who's Jake Richardson?" I questioned, once again feeling out of the loop.

"He plays a goth in the movie Hangman's Curse. He wears lots of eyeliner." Ok. That's weird. I guess that means I didn't get all the make-up off. Well, crap. I WILL get Max back for this! I was just playin' around when I dumped her in the lake. But then she does this! Screw the truce. She just started a whole new prank war. I hope she's happy.

Finally!

Lauren? What do you mean by finally?

Just what I said. It took ya long enough to call off the truce!

Well, now that that's over, do you have any ideas? My suggestion box is empty.

Now that you mention it...I do.

Well?

You know her Liam Rooney CD?

Yea...

This is what you do...

--------

Whoa, that's harsh. But in all fairness, she deserves it.

Exactly, Fang. This will sure show Justin who's crazy person is the best...

One, I'm not crazy. Two, I thought this was about me and Max, not your ex-boyfriend.

Yea, sure it is. Whatever you say, oh great master.

I think I'm starting to really dislike the voice in my head.

Max's POV

Oh crap. Fang's really mad. I mean REALLY mad. Not good. This is not good. Whoa there, self. It's ok. The dazed look on his face doesn't mean he's plotting against me with the voice in his head. Maybe he's planning to get me a Valentine's Day present. I hope. Maybe. Oh, who am I kidding?! He has a really good revenge plan, I just know it! I'm dead. Dead, dead, dead!

Maybe, if I'm really nice to him, he won't go through with his plan. It's worth a shot.

I dug in my pocket for the change that had accumulated there. I pulled out a shiny nickel and walked over to Fang, tapping his shoulder to get his attention.He whirled around, startled out of his thoughts.

"Hey, Fang? Do you want this nickel? It's shiiiinnnyyy!" I said the last part in a childish sing-song voice.

"No."

"What about," - I fished around in my pocket - "this shiny dime?"

He shook his head.

"A shiny quarter?" Another no. "Come on! I'm trying to be nice! Just take the stupid shiny money!"

Fang just gave me a confused glare. That sounds a bit hard to do, but he managed to pull it off. As he constantly reminds me, he can do anything. The thought made me roll my eyes.

"Hmpf. Fine then. Be that way, I don't care."

"Ok."

An unbearable silence washed over us. I sat, fidgeting with the hem of my shirt, waiting for Fang to say something. After ten minutes, I let out an agravated sigh and stomped off. If he wanted to be that way, that's his problem. I don't care. Nope, not me.

In the end, I would have rather stayed there with Fang. I got roped into playing hopscotch with Angel and Nudge. Darn the Bambi eyes...

After a very long thirty minutes of the childish game, I went back to my stuff to get out my Liam Rooney CD-- the one good thing that came out of staying with Anne. Or should I say the Spawn of Satan? Yes, she's only the Spawn of Satan. Jeb has the title of Satan covered.

When I opened the CD case, I shrieked in horror. My favorite CD --my only CD actually-- was completely ruined. It was scratched and broken down the middle.

"FANG!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. Everyone came running to see what the commotion was.

"FANG! YOU RUINED MY FAVORITE CD!"

He looked down at the ground. I think he was ashamed. He must not have known how much I loved that CD.

"Everyone. Go back to what you were doing," he said in a calm voice. He walked over to me, his guilt written all over his face. "Max, I'll get you a new one. I didn't know you liked it that much. I was just trying to get you back for the make-up thing." He seemed to mean it.

"Fang, you've restarted this war. I hope you know what you've done. By the way," I said before walking off, "I still expect you to get me new boots AND a new Liam Rooney CD. You know, while you're begging for forgiveness, you should bow down and kiss my feet." Did I really think he would do it? No. Did he? Of course.

Fang bent down, grabbed my foot and practically made out with it. I don't know who was more embarrased, me or him. We were both red in the face.

I left in search of something to occupy my time.

Fang's POV

"...You know, while you're begging for forgiveness, you should bow down and kiss my feet."

No way in hell would I do that.

Oh yes you will.

I unwillingly bent down and nearly frenched Max's foot. Nasty. Oh GOD! The horror! I think I was blushing, too. Even worse. I groaned as Max walked off. Now, I REALLY hate the voice in my head.

A/N: Ok. How was it? Not too funny if you ask me, but at least it's an update. Seriously, PLEASE give me ideas. My suggestion box is empty. The only suggestion that's left is incest. No way in h-e double toothpicks will I have GAngel (I guess you would call it that) in this fic. shudders Not happening. Hmn..I guess that means I gotta throw it out of the suggestion box. Which means, I got nothing. HELP! GIVE ME IDEAS!

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: I'm sorry it's been so long. My computer got a virus. I downloaded some free music and yea. It just got fixed. I decided to write an alternate ending to Chapter 30. I just thought the ending was too harsh and serious. So here it is. Sorry for the extremely long wait.

Disclaimer: Don't own Maximum Ride. I also deny the ownership of the Claimer Disclaimer thing. That's Myrah's.

Claimer: I own this.

Chapter 30 - In A Truce No More (Alternate Ending)

Fang's POV

As soon as I could, I took some soap down to the stream and cleaned my face. I scrubbed and scrubbed, trying to rid myself of the girliness.

When I was pretty positive I no longer looked like a clown gone wrong, I dried my face and headed back to camp. Angel ran up to me. "Fang, are you okay?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" I asked puzzled.

"Well, you look like a mix between Jake Richardson and a raccoon," Nudge said.

"Who's Jake Richardson?" I questioned, once again feeling out of the loop.

"He plays a goth in the movie Hangman's Curse. He wears lots of eyeliner." Ok. That's weird. I guess that means I didn't get all the make-up off. Well, crap. I WILL get Max back for this! I was just playin' around when I dumped her in the lake. But then she does this! Screw the truce. She just started a whole new prank war. I hope she's happy.

Finally!

Lauren? What do you mean by finally?

Just what I said . It took ya long enough to call off the truce!

Well, now that that's over, do you have any ideas? My suggestion box is empty.

Now that you mention it...I do.

Well?

You know her Liam Rooney CD?

Yea...

This is what you do...

- - - - - - -

Whoa, that's harsh. But in all fairness, she deserves it.

Exactly, Fang. This will sure show Justin who's crazy person is best...

One, I'm not crazy. Two, I thought this was about me and Max, not your ex-boyfriend.

Yea, sure it is. Whatever you say, oh great master.

I think I'm really starting to dislike the voice in my head.

Max's POV

Oh crap. Fang's really mad. I mean REALLY mad. Not good. This is NOT good. Whoa there, self. It's ok. The dazed look on his face doesn't mean he's plotting against me with the voice in his head. Maybe he's planning to get me a Valentine's Day present. I hope. Maybe. Oh, who am I kidding?! He has a really good revenge plan, I just know it! I'm dead. Dead, dead, dead!

Maybe, if I'm really nice to him, he won't go through with his plan. It's worth a shot.

I dug in my pocket for the change that had accumulated there. I pulled out a shiny nickel and walked over to Fang, tapping his shoulder to get his attention. He whirled around, startled out of his thoughts.

"Hey, Fang? Do you want this nickel? It's shiiiinnnyyy!" I said the last part in a childish sing-song voice.

"No."

"What about," -I fished around in my pocket- "this shiny dime?"

He shook his head.

"A shiny quarter?" Another no. "Come on! I'm trying to be nice! Just take the stupid shiny money!"

Fang just gave me a confused glare. That sounds a bit hard to do, but he managed to pull it off. As he constantly reminds me, he can do anything. The thought made me roll my eyes.

"Hmpf. Fine then, be that way. I don't care."

"Ok."

An unbearable silence washed over us. I sat, fidgeting with the hem of my shirt, waiting for Fang to say something. After ten minutes, I let out an aggravated sigh and stomped off. If he wanted to be that way, that's his problem. I don't care. Nope, not me.

In the end, I would have rather stayed there with Fang. I got roped into playing hopscotch with Angel and Nudge. Darn the Bambi eyes...

After a very long thirty minutes of the childish game, I went back to my stuff to get out my Liam Rooney CD - the one good thing that came out of staying with Anne. Or should I say the spawn of Satan? Yes, she's only the spawn of Satan. Jeb has the title of Satan covered.

When I opened the Cd case, I shrieked in horror. My favorite CD - my only CD actually - had Sharpie marks all over it. 'Liam Rooney sucks' was written on the disc.

"FANG!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. Everyone came running to see what the commotion was.

"LIAM ROONEY DOES NOT SUCK!"

Fang looked down at the ground. I think he was sorry. Either that or he's a really good actor.

"Everyone, go back to what you were doing," he said in a calm tone. He walked over to me, regret plastered on his face. "Max, I'll fix it. I didn't know you'd be that mad. I was just trying to get you back for that make-up thing. I'm sorry."

"And?"

"I'll never do it again."

"And?"

"I'm really sorry."

"And?"

"I'll really never do it again?"

"And?"

"I love you?"

I broke into a smile. A small one, but a smile nonetheless. But as quickly as it came, it was over. I put on a stern look.

"Fang, you've restarted this war. I hope you know what you've done. By the way," I said before walking off, "I still expect you to get me new boots AND a new Liam Rooney CD. Ya know, while you're begging for forgiveness, you should bow down and kiss my feet." Did I really think he would do it? No. Did he? Of course.

Fang bent down, grabbed my foot and practically made out with it. I don't know who was more embarrassed, me or him. We were both red in the face. I left in search of something to occupy my time.

Maybe I should wash my foot. It's kinda slimey.

Fang's POV

"...Ya know, while you're begging for forgiveness, you should bow down and kiss my feet."

No way in hell would I do that.

Oh yes you will.

I unwillingly bent down and nearly frenched Max's foot. Oh GOD! The horror! I think I was blushing, too. Even worse. I groaned as Max walked off. Now I REALLY hate the voice in my head.

Ugh. I need to wash my mouth out. Max's feet taste like vinegar and cornchips. Blech.

A/N: Well? Good? Bad? Pretty darn gangster? Vote now and you will receive a magic muffin. It will grant you 3 whole wishes. Oooh! Look at the fun. Review!

You know, I think this is one of my longest chapter ever. Woo!

Chapter 31's on it's way.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Real life experience here. Yes, I am that awesome. - Enjoy.

Disclaimer: Don't own MR.

Claimer: Do own Prank Wars.

Chapter 31 - Sharpie Fight!

Fang's POV

I admit it. I have a secret obsession with Sharpie markers. I have one of every color. It's one of those rainbow packs you can buy at Wal-Mart. What do I do with those Sharpies you may ask?

I took another sniff of the yellow marker in my hand. Giggling, I reached for the red one. Yes, Fang giggling. You read it correctly, I was giggling.

Well, I kinda maybe hypothetically sniff my Sharpies. What? They smell great! They make all your troubles go away. And you laugh all the time, even when nothing's funny.

A hand appeared in front of my face and pushed the Sharpie tip onto my nose. Great, now I have a red dot on my nose. Wonderful. I turned around and saw Max standing there smirking.

"Sniffing Sharpies again?"

"Nope. I'm trying to find the gateway to Happy Pony Candy Land."

"Haha, very funny," Max said. Before I could register what was happening, Max stole my red Sharpie.

"Hey! Give it back! It's mine!" Whoa, I was almost whining.

Max shook her head. She took the cap off the marker and drew a long line from my elbow to my wrist. Oh no she didn't!

I grabbed the black Sharpie out of my back pocket and made a big black slash on her forehead. "Sharpie fight!" I called to no one in particular.

Max took about seven markers from my bag while I got the rest from my pocket.Quickly, I took the caps off all of them, preparing myself for the duel.

I could nearly hear Max thinking. Something along the lines of "Oh, he's goin' down! He'll pay for writing Liam Rooney sucks. Grr."

Max's POV

Oh, he's goin' down! He'll pay for writing Liam Rooney sucks. Grr.

Fang's POV

Here we go...

Max jabbed the green Sharpie at me. I dodged it just in time. I ran at her, markers held high. I made a blue streak on her collar bone.

Before she could get me, I tackled Max to the ground, straddling her hips to hold her there. (A/N: That's not the only reason. ;-). Sorry. I had to put that there. I'll stop now.) I took the purple Sharpie and started streaking her hair with it. Once I made sure that you could tell her hair was purple, I got up and put the caps on my markers. I quickly snatched hers and did the same.

"Fang!" Max whined.

I cocked my head to the side.

"That's not nice, Fang!"

"Eh well."

Max pouted. And -dare I say it?- it was the cutest thing I've seen.

Max's POV

Stupid Fang. I guess that means he won the fight...

He helped me up and we headed back to camp. When we came within eyeshot of the Flock, they gasped and came running to us.

"What happened, Max? Why's you're forehead black? Why's your neck blue? Why's Fang red? Wh-"

"Nudge! It's fine. We got into a Sharpie fight. I guess I lost."

"You can say that again," Fang said, smirking. Darn him. He only won because he held me down. Does he even know how heavy he is? Do you even know? No, because he wasn't straddling you, he was straddling me. Why does that sound so...dirty?

Well, think about it, Max. He was straddling you. You don't seem all that upset about it either.

Oh be quiet, you. It's not my fault that a guy that just so happens to be my hot boyfriend was on top of me.

Again, just think about what you just thought. And you wonder why it's dirty.

I swear my voice was rolling it's eyes. If it even has eyes...

I'm going to ignore that very incorrect assumption.

Fine with me.

I pulled Fang away from the others. "You know, Fangy, I have quite a few tricks up my sleeve." I gave him a small kiss and walked off, trying to think of something to get the purple out of my hair.

A/N: Well? Sharpie fights are very fun. Everyone should try it sometime. Btw, I'm completely out of suggestions now. HELP!

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Sorry for the wait guys. I've been busy. I do have a life outside of Fanfic. It's called MSN. Lol. This chapter is dedicated to the fabulous Patch for letting me use him and his insane-ness in this chapter. It helped with my writer's block.

Warning: Extreme OOCness on Iggy's part.

Disclaimer: I don't own MaxRide.

Claimer: I own Prank Wars.

Chapter 32 - I'll Steal Your Pets And Kidnap Your Toast!

Iggy's POV

Dear lord! Does Nudge ever shut up?! Man, I have to do something to get her to stop. I depend on my hearing; I don't need her random chatter clogging it up!

"So Iggy, do you ever wonder about the meaning of life? I want a new nickname. What about...princess? Or something else really cool. Oh my gosh! I wanna go to New Zealand! I met this guy named Bradly and he thinks New Zealand is really cool. You know, this other guy named Patch - that's a weird name isn't it? And this other dude keeps saying Fang's emo. What's emo anyways?

"Did you ever notice how Jake Richardson kinda looks like Fang? Oh well, I guess you wouldn't but he does. And he's really hot too. Jake, not Fang. But Fang isn't hot. That's just ew.

"Oh my gosh! What if Max and Fang get "jiggy with it"? You know, I heard that line on -well, I don't remember where, but it was funny! So anyway, what if they have a baby? Eep! I'd be an aunt! Or something like that. I wish-"

I clamped my hand over her mouth in a pathetic attempt to stop the word flow. But like I said, it was a pathetic attempt. She bit my hand. I pulled it back and she began her rant again. That's it. When we go out to the store next, I'll fix this problem.

I heard Max and Fang walk over to us. "Come on guys. We're heading out to town for supplies. Who wants to come?" Max asked us.

"I will," I said. The others, excluding that mutt Total, said that they would rather stay here and play. Fang ended up staying behind to watch the younger kids.

Max and I were strolling along in the dense foliage, Total at my heels. I heard rustling in the bushes on my left. I turned my head in that direction and signaled for Max to be quiet.

Max' POV (Sorry for the POV switch. Iggy can't see to describe)

A boy around our age stepped out of the bushes. He had dirty blonde hair and gray eyes. He would be kind of cute if he wasn't a potential threat. Just as I shifted in a fighting stance, the boy cackled maniacally. Iggy and I shot him similar looks of freaked out-ed-ness.

He stepped up, hands out in a friendly manner. Pfft. As if.

"Who are you and what do you want?"

"Give me Vault or I'll steal your pet and kidnap your toast!"

"What toast?" Iggy asked nervously. I saw him tuck what looked like a piece of toast into his backpack. Where did that toast come from?

"That toast!" Freaky Boy replied.

"Ok," I said, stepping towards him. "Who the heck are you and why do you want his toast?"

"I'm Patch. And I want his toast because toast rocks. Duh!" Erm... Patch scares me.

"Well, too bad then. I don't have Vault. Now go away." As soon as the words left my mouth, Patch leapt into action. He grabbed Total and stuffed him into a bag at his side. He maneuvered around Iggy, snatching the not-so-well-guarded toast.

As quickly as he came, he left. There was nothing but the missing Total to prove that Patch was real. Oh God. How will I explain this to Angel?!

I walked forward, hoping to find the mutt somewhere. The ground made a crunching sound, like paper. I looked down, seeing a note. Patch must have left it!

'Dear Person,

I have your pet(s). You will never see it(them) again. They have been stolen.

As for your toast, I have kidnaped it. If you ever wish to see it again, you must bring me a twelve pack of Vault. Pronto. Or the toast gets it!

-With Love,

Patch'

Have I mentioned that this boy scares me? Why are the cute guys crazy?

Iggy looked like he was about to cry from the loss of his toast. "Iggy!" I snapped. "Pull it together man! You can get more toast!"

"But, Frank was special... We had so many memories."

"For goodness sakes, Ig! It was a piece of toast! We have more important issues. Like telling Angel about Total."

He immediately sobered up. Apparently he remembered how big of a fit Angel could throw.

We walked back slowly, trying to stall. Neither of us wanted to be the barer of bad news. One thing's for sure, Patch is scary. And if I ever see him again, I'll sick Fang on him.

A/N: And, done. I'm so so so SO sorry for the extremely long wait. I got a case of laziness. I plan on updating Strike Up The Band tonight.

I hope this made you feel better IAKIW.

A/N: Sorry for the delay. But here's a SuperBowl present for you. - And yes, Patch is insane.

Disclaimer: I don't own MaxRide.

Claimer: I own this.

Chapter 33 - Hostage

Max's POV

That was terrible. Angel threw the biggest fit on Earth over Total. I mean the worst, ugliest tantrum ever recorded. She screamed, she kicked, she cried, she made Iggy wear a blue dress, she bit Fang. I have no clue about that last one though. He probably thought something weird.

So of course, we had to go off to find Patch and get the stupid dog back. And Frank. Fang and I went to the store to get the Vault. Maybe, if we bring that and replacement toast, he'll give us the stupid mutt back.

We followed the trail of crumbs to a good sized clearing. A figure was sitting cross-legged on the other side, talking to something. We approached carefully, trying not to scare the poor mentally unstable boy.

He stiffened, putting his nose in the air to smell who was coming.

"So you have returned, children of the feather. Have you brought the drugs?" Is it just me or did Patch get even crazier?

We stepped lightly around the random bits of toast scattered everywhere. "If you mean the Vault, then yes, we did," Fang answered, as calmly as ever.

"Yay! You can stay for the tea party now!" We reached him as he turned around. Behind him, strapped to chairs, were Total and Frank. I gaped openly at them.

Patch grabbed the Vault and our wrists, dragging us to some seats. As soon as our butts connected with the chair, straps held my wrists, ankles, and wings. Oh Lord.

Patch's POV

Yay! I finally have some new friends! I love them so much I could huggle them. I cracked open some of the Vault and gave them some.

After they finished their drinks, I gave Frank the Toast some cookies. Don't tell Total, but Frank is my favorite.

I made some more cookies and brownies for my hostages. I mean guests. Yes, they're my lovely guests.

I headed to my bag and got out Twister, Scrabble, and Battleship. We'll need some entertainment for later. A tea party can only last for a little bit.

"Alrighty guys, I have a game for you."

"Is it called 'Let Us Go And Check Yourself Into The Looney Bin'?" Max asked.

"No, silly. It's called 'Help Me Get More Toast By Flying Me Places.'" I needed help getting from place to place. My resources are confined to Canada.

"Like hell. How do you even know about our wings?" Fang said.

"I have my resources. They don't call me Super Stalker for nothing." I grinned. Actually, I got that name because I know everything about everybody. And because I was caught going through The Fray's trash...

"No way," the two said in unison.

"Yes way. You have no choice. You see, I know how much Angel wants her little doggy back. I'll give him back if you two do my bidding for two weeks. That's all, only two."

They looked at each other, silently communicating. Max spoke up. "Fine, but we're not happy."

"Excellent," I said, imitating Mr. Burns perfectly.

A/N: Sorry it's so short. That's all I have the patience to do.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

Sorry, not an update. It will get replaced with a chapter when I get the next one typed up. Proceed with caution. Major rant. Major vile cuss words. Not suitable for children under the age of 13. You know what, read it anyway. It could entertain you.

Fernstorm77 reviewed: "Sorry, This SUCKS"

You are a damned coward. I am sick of people saying this story sucks. What the HELL are we sucking? Hmm? If you're going to flame me, at least have the fucking courage to leave me a way of contacting you and telling me why it fucking sucks.

Aw, were you scared I was going to cuss you out? I'm so sorry. But if you want to say this sucks, get a fucking spine.

You can take your damned sorry and shove it up your fucking ass. You just pissed me off. I don't want your fucking apology.

You know, you are the true bastard of Earth. You punch, then run away as fucking fast as you can. You're a coward. A no good, dirty, rotten, low-down coward.

You can get the FUCK away. I don't need your fucking limited vocabulary. If you truly hated this, don't you think you could come up with something better than "This sucks"? You could have said "This sucks dick. Your story made my skin crawl. It made my eyes bleed. It made me never want to read fanfic ever again." You see? At least I have an extensive vocabulary. I can say something's terrible with more than two words.

I can also piss someone off with one only sentence:

Go burn in the third level of hell, you bastard.

Have a swell day. :)

Now, if you any of you know who the hell Fernstorm77 is, please send them the link to this. It would mean a lot. Please and thank you.

Now, that goes as a warning, I suppose. I have a quick temper. I do not like getting a flame if you don't leave a valid email address. Valid meaning it's not fake and I can email you using it. Like I've said before, give me a fucking reason why my story sucks. Otherwise, you'll get your own rant devoted just to you.

A/N: I apologize for the lateness of the chapter. I thought Patrick would be writing it. His computer crashed so he had to start over when his schedule was already busy. We decided I could go ahead and write this chapter but leave out his part. So here it is. Enjoy.

Now. I don't want to bring up feelings of sorrow for Steve Irwin, because I know some of you were deeply hurt with his death. This is to relive the good days, not to make fun of him.

Disclaimer: I don't own MR.

Claimer: I own PW.

Chapter 34 - Iggy,The Bird-kid Hunter

Day fifteen without our leader and second in command. Day fifteen with me as leader. It's a lonely life at the top. Crikey! Is that Max?!

"No, Iggy. I know that look. It's just a crow. I think you've gone crazy. I heard that happens when people are under stress. It's not like we're stressful though. I mean, we only glued some feather on your face, held you down while Gazzy farted on you, and tied your shoes laces together. Plus we only tried to kill you six times..."

"Nudge!" he said sharply. "Do. You. EVER. Stop. Talking?!" Each word was said through gritted teeth.

She shook her head, her dark hair flying in all directions. "Nope. All Nudge, all the time. Talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, tal-"

"STOP! LORD, STOP IT NOW! THIS IS WHY I'M INSANE!" he cried, his hands shooting up in the air. Right then, if Ari came, Iggy would gladly force himself to play games with him straight for eight hours. Anything to stop the chatter!

"I hate to break it to you," Gazzy chimed in, "but you were already insane. On the inside. We just surfaced your immense feelings of craziness."

"Since when do you know those big words?" Iggy inquired.

"Since I read them on the projector over there." He pointed to the cameramen and they waved sheepishly back.

Iggy was, needless to say, shocked. Why were people filming his antics as he tracked down the missing members? Why did he smell donuts in the middle of a forest? And...is that a theme song he hears?

"What in hell is going on here? AND WHY DON'T I GET A DONUT!" Iggy shouted, fuming not so silently.

"This, babe, is Iggy, The Bird-kid Hunter. It's a big hit in the US and Canada. Even Australia! And...erm, we...ran out of donuts." Iggy wore a mask of disbelief. "I mean, pixies stole them? And put them in a worm hole. That ended in Kentucky. So you're never getting them back now! Mwaha!"

"No! Not Kentucky!!!" Iggy dropped to the ground with his head in his hands.

His ears pricked up as the bushes rustled. He jumped to his feet and dove into the underbrush, hoping to catch Max or Fang.

"Crikey! We got a big one here! He's a strong little bugger! I think it's Fang!" But alas, 'twas only a bear. A very angry bear...

The bear shook itself off and charged at the bird-boy. He ran blindly (in the literal sense of the word), right into a net Nudge had rigged up. He was suspended in the air, hanging from a tree branch.

"Crikey!" he cried.

Nudge groaned. "We're doing this for your own good Iggy." She promptly put up a sign beside the tree reading "Do not feed the crazy boy. He bites."

A boy, Edward something if my memory is still trustworthy, came by, picking up a stick and poking him with it.

"Hey! Stop that! Who's doing that? Stop!"

Edward simply snickered and walked away. What he was doing in Canada, I have no clue. Iggy continued his thrashing. Being smarter than your average bear, he pulled out his knife and cut himself free. He landed with a heavy thud. Hey, I said he was smarter than a bear, not Einstein.

The camera crew was laughing behind their hands, all the while thinking about the hit this episode would be.

A girlish screech sounded in the air and what looked like a shoe came falling down. "Maax! That was my favorite shoe!" Fang whined from above. The squabbling voices got closer until the owners landed, surprised at what they saw.

Fang grabbed his shoe, keeping his head down, though they could all see the blush painting his cheeks.

"Fang, was that you screaming?" Nudge asked.

Max started laughing, confirming the action between giggles. Fang pulled his hood up and tried to be invisible.

Max's POV

Fang was trying to tell me where to go. And I really can't stand when people order me around. We got into a little fight that ended with me throwing his shoe down to the ground and him screeching like a little girl.

We met up with the Flock in the clearing we landed in. I told Fang we should stop here. A smug smile slid across my face.

Then came the dreaded question. "Fang, was that you screaming?" I erupted into uncontrollable laughter as Fang hid from us.

"Where were you guys?!" Iggy exclaimed. "I nearly went crazy without you guys! They tried to kill me!"

"Nearly?" Nudge snickered. Iggy faked hurt and pretended to cry. His terrible acting was ignored.

"So where were you, Max?" Angel asked, concern and curiosity in her eyes. I could have some fun with this.

"Oh nowhere special. Fang and I just eloped." Everyone stopped what they were doing and stared.

"You...and Fang...what?!" That was the shortest thing Nudge ever uttered. Hallelujah!

I giggled again and quickly said, "Just kidding, guys. That Patch guy captured us. It was terrible!" I shuddered, remembering the experience.

"Tell us about it, Max!"

"Well, it happened like this..." And thus began my tale.

A/N: Mwaha! You have to wait till next time to find out what happened! Hope you like it. -

5/10/07

Yes, yes another rant.

Before I start, the reason I haven't posted is because there's a lot going on in my life right now and I can't find the words. Sorry.

Now.

It has come to my attention that another person has copied my story. Word for word in some places. And the list goes on about what other similarities there are. I am so SICK of people stealing my ideas.

What now? I've already posted Claimers on my chapters. Do I need to write DON'T EFFING STEAL THIS every five lines, too?

Can you guys please be freaking original AND NOT STEAL MY IDEAS?!

Do you realize what that is? It's called plagiarism. It's a crime.

Now dammit. Stop this. Okay? I'm not playing Little Miss Nice Girl anymore. Because this has happened about 4 times now.

They haven't been as bad as this though. This is down right maddening.

So AddictedToEdward, come out, come out wherever you are and use your own DAMNED ideas. Mkay?

Did anyone else notice that her penname is paraphrasing mine (EdwardAddict)? I just randomly noticed that.

Okay. So. ATE, if you do not delete that story, I will report you.

And yes, I seem very bitchy. But you know what? You would be too if four, count 'em FOUR, people have copied your idea. So. Excuse me.

And yes, I will update soon. I have the next chapter partly written.

Now. Have a wonderful day, everyone.

-EA

5/11/07

Okay. I PMed that person last night. Apparently they decided not to be reported. They changed their penname and deleted the story. And of course PMed me telling me how stupid I was and how much of a bitch I am because I got pissed they stole my story. -rolls eyes-

But really. I'm sick and tired of this. Some of you have said imitation is the sincerest form of flattery and that it's such a good idea, others want to use it.

Personally, I think it's just lame. Now. To those of you who think I overreacted, put yourself in my shoes. I come home from a stress-filled day at school to find someone plagerising my work. Now. Do you still think I overreacted? I thought not.

Hopefully, the update will be coming soon. So just hang tight a little longer.

A/N: Again, sorry for the delay. Things have been hectic at home. And I mean that in so many senses. I've been trying so hard to get this chapter up, since I have the next one basically written out in my head. But with everything going on... Either way. I hope you enjoy this.

This is Patch's perspective on what happened during the two weeks of enslavement.

Disclaimer: I don't own MR, nor do I own How To Save A Life.

CLAIMER: I OWN THE PRANK WARS. Ha.

Chapter 35 - Patchapalooza

Patch's POV

At last, I had the bird children under my command! With their superpowers, I could get all the toast in Canada! Maybe even the world! It's just a nice plus that Max is a cutie.

I had left Max and Fang alone for about ten minutes so they could get used to the fact that they basically sold me their souls for the next two weeks.

The first few days we just caught up, filled each other in on our lives. Our main conversation went like this:

Max: "Do you like Canada?"

Fang: "Well, um, I like freedom, as in not being your slave."

Me: "I SAY WE PAINT TIGER STRIPES ON OUR FACES AND GO FREE ALL THE ANIMALS IN THE ZOO!"

And that we did. Of course, the plan didn't go over so well. Right when we were about to ride the kangaroos outta there, the zoo police caught us. We (meaning Max and Fang) helped find and return all the animals before they did too much damage.

After that fiasco, I had Fang and Max take turns carrying me off to various drop off points. I did my act, appearing and stealing pets and kidnaping toast, leaving ransom notes in their wake.

Hmm... It's a good thing I got two of those flying people. They come in handy when it comes to carrying all my new possessions.

I lifted my head from my pile of pillows and rang a small, tinkling bell. Just the sound seemed to laugh at my thoughts.

"Oh yeah?! Well take this, you stupid bell!" I chucked it at the wall, successfully clobbering Fang over the head with. Oopsie?

My slave merely sighed and adjusted his maid costume, complete with black and white lacey frills. "You rang, master?"

"Yes! I desire cookies! And cake! Oh! While you're at it, go ahead and tell my other slaves I desire amusement."

"Yes, master," he said as he clip-clopped away in his mandatory heels. Quickly (just like I liked it) The Fray appeared in my doorway, already setting up their equipment.

They began my favorite song of theirs, How To Save A Life.

Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
And you begin to wonder why you came

HELP ME! HELP ME!

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

HELP ME! HELP ME!

A crowd suddenly appeared, cheering to the band. Yes, sometimes I do let others enjoy the wondrous work of them, but usually they're all mine!

Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you

HELP ME!

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

HELP ME! HELP ME!

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came

HELP! HELP! HELP!

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

HEELLLPPP MEEEE!!!!

Why yes, I was quite aware of the few altered lyrics, but it did have a catchy beat to it, so I decided to let them live.

Max's POV

While The Fray was distracting Patch with their cries for help, Fang and I quickly slipped away from the prison-like house. Yes, we were scheduled to be released in a few days, but all the other slaves were supposed to have been freed too! We left, no looking back. It was every man, er, bird kid, for themself! Though we did have to find Total before we could leave for good. Stupid mutt.

We finally managed to find the Flock and relate to them our tale. And return Total to Angel's waiting arms. I repeat, stupid mutt.

"And so ends the tale of Patch," Fang finished for me. Yes. Let's put that whole episode out of our minds.

I snuggled up into Fang's comforting embrace. Something that felt like a stick was thrown at my head.

"Who threw that?!"

Iggy glared in my direction. "Just where is my Frank? You didn't forget him, did you?"

Uh-oh...

Max, forget the toast! The time for fun and games is ending. Your real destiny awaits you.

Perfect. Beasty's back to his "save the world" mumbo jumbo. Joy.

A/N: Ah! One more chapter left. So excited. It should be up soon. I really hope you guys liked it.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

A/N: Sad to say this is my last chapter for The Prank Wars. I've loved bringing you entertainment! I really wish I could have made it to my 50 chapter goal :P

Disclaimer: I don't own MR.

Claimer: I own The Prank Wars and anything you don't recognize as being owned by James Patterson or other labels/people that I have mentioned.

Chapter 36 - As The Color Fades

Max's POV

Beasty said it was time to move out. It was time to save the world, Maximum Ride style.

I looked up to the sky, letting rain pour on me. It washed away our childish squabbles, our meaningless pranks. We'll always keep the memories in our hearts, for that's all that's left. The colors from the dyes are fading, the glue is coming unstuck, and all my things were returned.

Our prank war was a pleasant distraction at the time, but it's time to move on. As Beasty says, we've aged, and so should the way we act.

The whole six month ordeal taught me a great deal. I learned who to trust, who to turn to, who truly loves me, and who truly does NOT look good multi-colored.

"Max?"

"Yeah, Fang?" Fang and I had gotten much closer during our short stay with Patch. It was just us against the world, trying not to go crazy in a place where "sane" was making a teenage boy wear a frilly maid costume.

"What are we going to do? I mean, we don't know where we need to go and we don't even know what we're saving the world from."

"I guess we'll just have to wing it." He smiled at the pun.

I allowed myself to drift back to the beginning of all this. Erasers kidnaping Angel, Ella and Dr. Martinez, Jeb, Ari, Anne, going to a real school. The tank. I shuddered, switching my gears to the fun-filled recent past. Truth or Dare, make-up, revenge, sugar highs, The Golf Cult, even. The thought brought a smile to my face.

Max, would you like to know why Lauren and I helped you out with this foolishness?

You mean you didn't just want me to have fun? And Lauren was actually on your side?

Well, yes and no. I did want you to enjoy your life for a while, but it was all key to your destiny. And Lauren was assigned to help out by the agency. She wouldn't share a head with me, so she entered Fang's head.

So all this time, we were just the School's pawns?!

Again, yes and no. The School doesn't really play as big of a role as you think. Max, this goes beyond a few scientists. You have to save the world from themselves.

And that is?

Silence. The first time in ages Beasty hasn't responded to me. Fang's hand waved in front of my face, trying to claim my attention.

"Sorry. Voice," I replied with a sheepish smile.

"What was he saying?" Fang wrapped his arms around me, sensing that it was serious.

"I have to save the world from everyone, basically. This whole time, all these pranks, Beasty, Lauren, they were all just teaching us lessons so I could save the world. All this time I thought we were just having a little time to be normal kids."

A few tears slipped from my eyes, despite my efforts to stop the flow.

"Hey there," he cooed. "It'll be okay. And if you ever need to be a kid, I'll beat up that voice of yours so we can frolic through the flowers, singing happy songs."

I laughed, just picturing Fang skipping around, a circle of pansies adorning his head like a crown.

"And just what's so funny there, Chuckles?" I couldn't answer. Fang had pushed me to the ground, tickling me mercilessly.

His thumb poked me in my side. "Thumb Of Doom!" he cried out. We rolled around, knocking over Nudge in the process.

Soon the others joined in on our big huddle of laughter. Lucky me, they all dogpiled on top of me.

A twig snapped in the distance. I looked up to see The Golf Cult approaching. I leapt to my feet, wondering what could happen.

"How did you find us?" Fang inquired.

"A prophet, our messiah, Ari, came to our leader in a vision, telling him we must help you in your conquest."

Whaa? Voice, The Golf Cult has to help save the world?!

Of course. They're the most important part.

Maximum Ride. Two percent avian, ninety-eight percent human. Lived in a dog crate most of her life. On the run for the rest. Now, a voice in her head is telling her she must save the world with the help of golf-obsessed teens who believe her little brother is their messiah.

Yep. That's me, alright. My life just gets better and better.

I shrugged, turning to the Flock. "Let's do this!" We each put our right wing in a circle formation before leaping into the sky, watching as The Cult unfolded their own wings.

This has been one wild ride, and it's not even over yet!

A/N: Well. What do you guys think? Personally, it's my favorite chapter. Yes, there will be a sequel. I'll be posting a thank you chapter to all my readers soon after this.

Thank you all for everything!

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.

Guys. The Prank Wars is officially over. Some of you have been with me since day one, pushing me to write more. Some joined later. More power to you, because I barely have the attention span to read my own story in one sitting.

You guys were there when I had my breakdowns, when I spazzed, and when I ranted. You guys rock, and I look forward to reading your reviews for the sequel (which should be up within a week if all goes well.)

So here's to you! I've tracked down everyone that has reviewed thus far. Kudos for making it through my abnormally long, and disturbing story!

Mind you, I've most likely miscounted. So if you find any errors, don't tell me. :)

ONE REVIEW

Katroti Opesi

lightwings

TheLadyKnightOfTortallan

creativitylieswithin

Dreamer-MRAF

Man I'm like bored and stuff

booknut

fan-girls2.0

blackwingsofdoom

angelz on edge

plainlyironic

teenprodigy

resident vampire

Eeroh2350

nickiej10

Amanda

Kristinaaaa

iluvtama

Sara

Ace

ninjagirl54

Jarcarga

Hannah

i. 3.Fang.so.there

Fangness

notrealnamesays:

Hikaru-neko

mornir

Fedward

Emma

Eye Witness

brieanna

Child of Art and Darkness

papercut-doll

Binky

einstein999999

lil'lizzzzzz

Yue-neko

MaxRideJunkie

DivideByNegativeZero

turtlelover523

Xannah

Fangsgurl4life

Xanny

Fnicknmax

Black Rain

squeejeefaxmachine

Fang's penpal

Dark Wings in the night Sky

FangObsessed

flymypretties

333eevee

Set.Me.Free.123

Jdog

I luv FANG

chocolate4eva

FireDitto

Shaquita

Zara

summer-flower-girl

lulu

TheLimit

Luna the Moon Fairy

Emaryllis

randomperson

Maxruls312

Skittles

Elley

lo

Kareh

CantThinkOfAName

Nevergurl

angelwingsfromMR

You shalt not know my name!

LuvRGrl63

Fernstorm77

This account is not used

Sylvia Riddle

St. Fang of Boredom

leaves at autumn

BurnThePicture

Haloclimb

Lively48

Don't live in Fear

theLunchbox

kikyomusdie

JadeKatana3

silentkiller

Fernstorm77 - Fernstorm77. Boy. I chewed your ass out. :) Guess you're not reading this. But either way. I guess we all learned a little something that day. :D

TWO REVIEWS

lizzie 105

Fangs-Girl

Jordi

edwella-lover12

silverchakrawolf

-Jeisa-

lune

FantasyFan5

BluvsE4everandever-xoxo

Max

Blue715

FrankIeroxOwnsMySoul

Texas Gal 23

KirsteenArwenKallisto

evil meg

Maximum-Ride99

61593animals

hyper.much911

kenko the spellcaster

twilight xx3

savinglifelessness

filmmakersdream - I love your stories!

i.dance.in.the.rain - And yours, too:D

yeah4fax!

Bixxa

Da Jitter Bug - GASP! AND YOURS!

THREE REVIEWS

kat

Maximumsuperiority

Nicole

Anna

jdeppAddict - Well, well. What to say? We were friends. We got in a huge fight. I apologized. You followed suit. We're on thin ice right now. We still have issues. Well, if you don't, I know I sure as hell do. Don't know why I included you on here, seeing as you read a total of three chapters that I forced you to read. Well whatever. Here's to drama!

THISxHOUSExISxNOTxAxHOME

stormgirl13

Wait For The Stars

SilverEmber282

FOUR REVIEWS

Darra

AngelStainedCrimson

Callie Noelle

x X Electrify X x

CoudyWind732984

Shadow the Bird Kid - JACK! Babe, you rock so hard!

Aqua279

MaxRideObsessed

Kitten1693

dumdum.like.gumgum

FIVE REVIEWS

God's servent

magicmehome - Guess what. I LOVE YOUR STORY TOO:O

Erik's Muse

XxLillyxX

SIX REVIEWS

violetpurple14

xXdiamondwolf027Xx

EdwardIsTheHottestVampire - That he is. Edward is the hottest.

kaitlyn

SEVEN REVIEWS

The Queen of Everything - I bet you're not the queen of Fragdoodle Land! HAHA!

fullmetalvampire747

EIGHT REVIEWS

smallvilleshowdown

NINE REVIEWS

da archer

FallenAngel5439

lildragonpet

Azulcat

TEN REVIEWS

Anonymous

ELEVEN REVIEWS

Uzumaki Nekkyo

Captain Kangaroo

Riyu21

TWELVE REVIEWS

crash923

THIRTEEN REVIEWS

marie47

Myrah - AND I ADORE YOUR STORIES! Thank you for all your support :D

FIFTEEN REVIEWS

Yascarocks

xo-MidnightSun-ox

EIGHTEEN REVIEWS

SelfHatred

XIrishXDreamerX - What do you know? I love your fic too. Small world, eh?

TWENTY-FOUR REVIEWS

cloud64 - Oh my god. Patch, where do I even start? We've been talking for nearly a year now and your parents still think I'm a stalker! -sighs- Well. You're what kept me updating after my computer crashed. You helped me out with my problems, and you put David in his place. We've had some interesting talks (coughcough-Emilyaskingyoursize-coughcough). Some converations were short, some lasted for hours. Nevertheless, you never failed to make me feel better. You introduced me to awesome music (Out Of My League, The Fray, GIRLFRIEND! Damn you for that one . ) Anyway. Just thanks. Wow. What a cruddy word to use. I need to make a new one to describe what I feel...

I GOT IT! No wait. Never mind. I'll work on it. Don't be surprised if it takes longer than your nickname did. But for now, I guess thank you will work well enough. Love you!

TWENTY-FIVE REVIEWS

Casey Jewels

TWENTY-SEVEN REVIEWS

ffgirlmoonie

TWENTY-EIGHT REVIEWS

Supergirrl - AH! You rock! You've given me loads of advice and story bits. Thank you so much!

THIRTY REVIEWS

SamanthaFantasyFan - Whoa. Thirty reviews! We have no life. Lol So basically, you rock so hard, it makes me jealous. :D Thank you for reading my story and always having something to say about it!

THIRTY-EIGHT REVIEWS

iluvzuzu - Congrats, zuzu! You get the grand prize for most reviews! -gives you three wishes- Spend them wisely. Thank you for reading and reviewing! Rock on!

Ah! Guys! You guys just... Thank you for all the support. It's meant so much to me. I mean, we hit the 600 review mark!

More thanks now.

The following added my story to their favorites.

Amethyst Prongs

AngelStainedCrimson

Azulcat

Bloody Joy

Blue715

BurnThePicture

California Marshmallow

Callie Noelle

Captain Kangaroo

Casey Jewels

Child of Art and Darkness

CocoaMoo Vamp.

CoudyWind732984

Darra

Don't live in Fear

DracosQueen180

EdwardIsTheHottestVampire

Eeroh2350

Elizabeth Tudor

Eye Witness

Fang's penpal

FangObsessed

FantasyFan5

Fedward

Fnick-Gurlz

FrankIeroxOwnsMySoul

God's servent

Godsgirl15

GuardianOfthebrokenhearted

I luv FANG

KWSN

Kareh

KillingTime

KirsteenArwenKallisto

Kitten1693

Lively48

Luna the Moon Fairy

LuvRGrl63

Maximum-Ride99

Maximumsuperiority

Moriko-Demon

Myrah

SamanthaFantasyFan

Set.Me.Free.123

Shadow the Bird Kid

Silver Wind Kitsue

SilverEmber282

St. Fang of Boredom

THISxHOUSExISxNOTxAxHOME

Uherenye

Uzumaki Nekkyo

Wait For The Stars

X Orangey x Love X

XxLillyxX

angelalways17

barnsy14

cloud64

edwella-lover12

einstein999999

flymypretties

fullmetalvampire747

gaaranojutsu02

iluvtama

kenko the spellcaster

legagymnast

lildragonpet

lizzie105

magicmehome

marie47

qwsedcrfvt

resident vampire

sarahbellum

sasuke's wife

smallvilleshowdown

smellerbe1

the Lunchbox

tkeiya

turtlelover523

vami

violetpurple14

x Teardrops Of Sunshine x

x X Electrify X x

xXdiamondwolf027Xx

xo-MidnightSun-ox

zoetha.ducky

zutarafan10

Okay, okay. Enough rambling now. Just. Thanks to everyone!

-EdwardAddict (Hillary)

And before I forget again, here's a note from Patch:

HOW DARE THEY TRY TO STEAL ME?!?!?! THEY MUST NEVER TRY TO STEAL PATCH! FOR I AM GREAT! ADDICTED TO EDWARD, WATCH YOUR TOAST! IT WILL BE KIDNAPPED! AND YOUR PETS WILL BE STOLEN!

Haha! I win. No you can't steal my stuff, Patchy. -sticks tongue out-

Now, I'm done. :D

Hey guys! I just posted the first chapter of the sequel.

Title: The Golf Cult R Us

Go check it out. I hope you like it! I have a lot up my sleeves for it. :D

-EdwardAddict

Hey guys! Long time, not talk, huh?

Don't kill me, but…

I'm redoing The Prank Wars.

Well, not really redoing. I'm just going back and fixing the mistakes I was to lazy to patch when I wrote it.

I have so many mistakes because I'm a lazy authoress who doesn't like to reread her work before she posts it. xD

So. I hope you all like the changes I'll be making.

Thank you again to everyone that has read this story, and especially those who have reviewed and who have favorited me and the story.

Peace, Love, and Bird-Kids.

--EA